Satire
The happenings of Hillstead Heights
Chapter 1. Herbert Von Ickstein sat perched on the very edge of the seat, so far in fact, that every time the old bus rattled and jutted over a particularly bumpy patch of road, it threatened to topple him off. He stared anxiously out the window as the green fields and unkept hedges lining the road rambled past. Laying across his lap was a polished briefcase and a black bowler hat, both of which he held onto with extreme precaution. He was alone on the bus, besides the old man sitting down the front deep in conversation with the driver. The bus slowed as the road sloped and wound its way down into what Herbert could see was a little town. He could see smoke puffing from chimneys and neat rows of fences lining the streets. Hillstead Heights, which contrary to its name, lay in a valley surrounded by rolling hills dotted with white specks that Herbert could just make out as sheep. It was here in this sleepy little town that there had been a number of strange occurrences reported.
By Laynie helms 4 years ago in Fiction
Things Lost By The Wayside
Either I do not pay a great deal of attention the Catholic YouTube/radio's EWTN Network or this outlet is somewhat lacking minority representation. This does not make it/them worse or very different from radio's Black Information Network; I find them to both be almost of equal value, obviously in separate and differing ways.
By P. B. Friedman4 years ago in Fiction
In Defense of Offense
It seems you can’t go anywhere these days without seeing another “in defense of (fill in the blank)” article. By always taking the defensive position these articles have given the offense minded article writer, and offensive articles in general an undeserved bad rap. I for one am sick of it and have decided to take a bold, and dare I say brave stand, in defense of offense. I will defend offense until my very last breath and I will never be defensive about the offensive unless of course I am defending it from unfair defensive attacks. I recognize that this position in defense of offense will be unpopular with offensive defenders but someone has to stick up for the little guy. Offense has been on the defense for way too long. It has stood silently by as defense after defense has been written, and done nothing. That ends today. Offense is going on the offense and I will defend offense from any all defensive attacks no matter how offensive or defensive they may be. This is war, plain and simple, and defenses days are numbered. It’s time for the offensive to begin.
By Everyday Junglist4 years ago in Fiction
Preamble to the Constitution of the United Vegetables of the Refrigerator Crisper
Author’s note: A friend challenged me to rewrite the preamble to the US Constitution including the phrase “…in order to form a more perfect onion” which for some reason this friend found particularly hilarious. I thought it was kind of cute too and decided to accept the challenge. It was actually fairly difficult but I do like what I managed to come up with.
By Everyday Junglist4 years ago in Fiction
Local supervillain distraught to learn that science and mechanical engineering are in fact, two separate fields of knowledge.
Earlier this week local supervillain Iam Evil, the internationally reviled businessman, made international headlines after kidnapping a dozen scientists for some nefarious purpose. A local reporter managed to use his press credentials to gain access to the volcanic lair where Mr. Evil was holding the scientists, and he was there to report on the evil scheme, and how the various doctors figured into it.
By Holden Marx4 years ago in Fiction
In Tribute To The Late, Great, Jason Morton
Jason R. Morton sadly passed away yesterday at the age of 324. As one of the founding fathers of Globadyne Industries, Jason founded the company with his longtime companion and business partner, Sharice Brouliett. The two were shrewd entrepreneurs, opening up several businesses, and building a legacy that lasted the past 274 years. As a media mogul, telecommunications mogul, entertainment mogul, and land developer, over what has been nearly the past three centuries, he's lived an astounding life.
By Jason Ray Morton 4 years ago in Fiction
