Humor
It’s A Magical Life
The Queen liked chocolate. She was enamored with it. This is how the currency of the land came to be. We don’t trade in gold, silver, even copper or bronze. Diamonds and rubies have little worth. We trade in chocolate. The more chocolate you own, the more of a chance you have to attain The Queen’s favor. She controls all of the assets, your access to the market, even your ability to marry your true love. After all, she understands love. Your intended must be as good as chocolate.
By Lacie Perry4 years ago in Fiction
Bloody Penlander-Pencilvanian War Continues With No End In Sight
The ink stains of the dead Penlanders are as fresh as the horror and dismay over the fates of the many Pencilvanians erased from the front lines. This centuries old conflict shows no signs of abating as fighting renewed again yesterday at the contested border between the two warring nation states. Hardest hit by loss were the famed Penlander fountaineers claiming some 500 dead in the first five minutes of fighting alone. They stormed the Pencilvanian front lines early and with numbers but ran head first into a hail of graphite re-enforced artillery shells lobbed from deep behind enemy lines. The battle tested #2 company of the Pencilvanian army then counter attacked with a neat pincer move attempting to sever the head of the Penlander BiC brigade, so named for its legendary leader General Brad (ironside) Cotton. General Cotton called for a counter-attack but the Pencilvanians gelled as a unit, hardened their lines with their mechanicalized troops, and repulsed the counter easily with a simple brush stroke. In a last ditch maneuver to salvage something from the horrendous string of losses the General fielded razor company and the 101st lighter brigade consisting of several thousand battle tested Penlander shock troopers. They attacked in ball point formation exploiting a small crack in the Pencilvanian lines. At the point of impact ink and black carbon flew in all directions as the ancient enemies met in bloody tip to tip fighting. This reporter will never forget the horror of that sight and prays for a swift end to this seemingly never ending war.
By Everyday Junglist5 years ago in Fiction
Sharing with Pop Pop
I will start by admitting that my father and I have large sweet tooths. In fact, they are large enough to possibly qualify as sweet bones. I’d always thought it was a learned trait and I could possibly prevent my kids getting the same. That is where this story begins.
By Michelle McBride5 years ago in Fiction
Kitchen Royale
At what point do you consider something to be a vice? Is it when someone repeats a habit so consistently; that missing it completely throws them off? Marlon has a serious vice. Every Friday, he leaves work ten minutes before closing just so that he can make it to the corner bakery. It’s a shoddy little hole in the wall that not many people notice. Even he accidentally fell into it. On the way out, he’s always caught with judgemental eyes but his hankering and addiction to confections overrides his sensibilities and his ability to feel guilt. In five minutes he’s able to reach the bakery. With it’s grey facade and dark tinted windows it perfectly conceals the pastry heaven on the inside. The hanging doorbell rings as he hustles in as if he’s reached refuge. No one is at the counter but Marlon isn’t phased. He inspects the display case. All the tarts glisten with their glazes, powdered pillows of dough are covered in powdered sugar like little bunnies all nestled together, and then there’s chocolates; too many to keep track of.
By Go Strongwill5 years ago in Fiction
Chocolate By Death
Death took a shortcut through the shopping mall. He tended not to linger – when he did, shops closed, businesses went bankrupt, trees died and so on – and most people, not noticing Death until he was looking them in the face, just felt a chill down the spine and a portent of their own mortality.
By Andy Killoran5 years ago in Fiction
