Humor

Superbowl LVI Party with the Astrology Signs
Aries was a big sports fan, and to celebrate his favorite day of the year, Superbowl Sunday, he invited 11 of his closest friends to his house for a Superbowl party. He cleaned his living room, laid out a spread of chips and dip, and was just setting out paper plates and napkins when the doorbell rang.
By Jocelyn Joy Thomas4 years ago in Fiction
A Funny Thing Happened on My Way to Hell Today: Chapter Two
My Headlong Dive through the Looking Glass Of course, my entrance wasn’t all that inconspicuous. Not unsurprisingly you can’t just walk into Hell. That’s a good thing if you think about it, sort of guarantees that no one bumbles into it accidentally, and gives a certain sense of confidence that no one can just leak out. Whatever Michael did seemed to have triggered a lightning storm, and I came in right through it. Everything went topsy turvy for twelve or thirteen seconds while I flipped head over heel trying to find my feet, and then I was very abruptly standing under my own power in a billowing cloud of sand.
By Jo Carroll4 years ago in Fiction
Dear Dr Particle
# 1. Vacuum Cleaners Dear Dr Particle, I am a law student who works in fast food. We buy oil in 44-gallon drums. That stuff gets in my clothes, my hair, my skin and I smell like 3-day old fried onion all the time.
By A.J Hart4 years ago in Fiction
Pineapple Pizza Monday
Mondays at work were always long days, Harley thought. After a weekend with his girlfriend, Jamie, he was dying for a quiet evening without meaningful conversation. He’d set up a date with Luke (who had, of course, named his dog “AnnaLee”) to watch the local baseball game with him, and ordered his own favorite, a large pineapple and ham (“Large Mauai, deliver 6:45” he heard shouted out) pizza. His ‘fridge was stocked with Molson and a few IPAs, and there were still a few pounds left of potato chips and Cheese Fish from the Costco packages, only slightly smaller than their puppy chow bags. Sam, his cubicle’s mirror-man (desk across from him, with only a plexiglass barrier; they would sometimes play, like the Marx brothers, that a looking-glass had been removed) asked if he was doing anything special that night, a common afternoon query designed less to elicit an answer than to convey that any conversation beat pretending to work. Harley had just shaken his head, which truthfully expressed his expectation. Just a quiet evening with a friend, he anticipated.
By Jed Somit4 years ago in Fiction
Our Time-O-Scope Shows That All Of The Kids At The Science Fair Will Go On To Do Great Things, Except For Tommy, Who Will Die Horribly By The End Of This Fair.
“Welcome, everyone, to the 14th annual Bronson LaFollette 8th Grade Science Fair, where this year for the first time we will be judging the entries not just on originality, completeness, and scientific accuracy, but also on how much today’s performance in the science fair impacts your little darling’s future performance in society, thanks to the Time-O-Scope that Mr. Ott has finally perfected, the patent for which he has generously granted to the school after using it to realize that the three children born to his marriage would actually be the result of an affair his wife is having with his brother, one which started, ironically, at the same time he began to devote himself to inventing the Time-O-Scope! Could’ve used this little number before you actually invented it, eh, Mr. Ott? Live and learn, live and learn.”
By Briane Pagel4 years ago in Fiction
Troy Alexander: Hush & Scream Part Two.
Agent Billy Hill walks into Violet's Hosptial Room and introduces himself. Troy stands up and introduces himself to Billy. Billy expressed his condolences to Violet and her family. Billy walks into the hallway and asks Troy will come with him. Troy tells Alexis to stay with his family. Troy kisses Alexis and leaves. Violet tells Alexis that Brian can take care of himself. Alexis sits by Violet's side and she says I am so sorry What happened to your family and I hate we met under these circumstances. Violet says the only thing I am worried about is Kevin his right kidney was very damaged in the attack. Violet starts crying saying I tried to protect them . Alexis hugs Violet to comfort her and Amanda hugs her mom also.
By Victor Robinson II4 years ago in Fiction
Moxie in "Midnight For Everybody!"
Nico Orsini’s last thoughts, as he faced imminent death, were of Myrna Loy, on whom he had bestowed the honor of being, “The greatest dame alive.” He sang her praises, to friends and family alike—until they were so bored by his devotion, he suspected that it might even have hurt her box-office in the greater New York City area!
By Eric Wolf4 years ago in Fiction
The Universe Through A Child's Eyes
There is something about life as a parent that provides us with a feeling of history and a well established craving to send on into the cutting edge the extraordinary things we have found with regards to life. Furthermore a piece of that is the longing to impart in our youngsters the affection for science, of learning and especially the adoration for nature.
By Mandeep Singh4 years ago in Fiction
The Drunkard's Deal
Listen, you’re human right? So you get to know the feeling when something you did black out drunk comes back to bite you in the ass. Maybe it was a picture of yourself dancing on a table, to Let It Go, topless. That you’re friends then showed around at a birthday party. Now Nana won’t look you in the eyes.
By Elyssa Burd4 years ago in Fiction
Here I Am
Here I Am The bus rumbled like an empty stomach. We missed the bus stop by ten yards. It did stop. I got off alone. I didn’t wave; I trundled on; I had a hand-drawn map; it was damp with sweat, was it the right place? I thought so. She told me her farm would be easy to find. There was nothing here. Miles of green paddy fields. Or were they her farm?
By Colin Devonshire4 years ago in Fiction
The First Dance
They say your first official dance with a person is supposed to be magical but my first experience was at the age of sixteen with a friend at my high school formal. We were both having the time of our lives just dancing with friends all night, having fun as normal teens do. As we're wrapping up on the last group dance and getting ready for our staff to announce the court. We come down from dancing to go walk over to get some water from the beverage table they had up, and as we were making our way to the floor so the court could be announced a girl behind me had stepped on my dress and we had slipped together but it wasn't too serious of a fall, we go to helped each other up we laughed and walked away. As we walk to separate we continue to go back to them announcing court. As they announced the king and queen of the formal, everyone clapped for them and as they made a small little speech coming to the end of it they had a couple join them on the dance floor to have the first slow dance with the court. Happen to know the court, My date and I were picked to join them on the dance floor, as we make our way through everyone I notice a little water on the ground and had told my date there's water on the ground “we need to wipe it up “ he looks at me and says there no water could just be the glare from the lights flashing. As we make our way to the floor I push past the water being on the ground and as the song is about to play we get in position to start dancing. As he comes to spin me around I noticed the water I stepped over it this first time and he as in my date had seen it so as were dancing he trying to avoid the water but as were dancing I'm looking at him he slowly starts to falling and after I have seen him slipped on the little puddle of water on the ground I see he goes to grab onto me and well let's just say we're both lying on the ground after the song ends laughing because we slipped. As we were laying there laughing and everyone wanting to help us up and laughing we just continued to laugh about it as we went to get up were asked by staff if we were fine and nothing broke or anything with them being concerned about us falling we say no and go back to dancing. As the dance comes to an end we go outside a while talking my date brings up the fall and asked if I was embarrassed I tell him, no I wasn't it happens and he just smiles at me and says okay. As he continues to go on with what he was catalyzing he smile, an had asked if he could take me home since my dress was wet and he didn't want me going to get dinner like that. As I looked at him in an elated way he smiles and asked if I was ready to go. As you come to read my short little story I want you to think about a time you had that embarrassing moment and share it with someone. But please if you like my story leave a comment and subscribe also like and tip , have more stories to write about. :)
By Corinne Delgado4 years ago in Fiction
Arthur
Arthur Arthur’s life improved dramatically after his wife died. I mean, he was sad and all that, but not as sad as he thought he should be. It troubled him somewhat. Arthur decided he'd better enrol in grief counselling, just in case he wasn’t doing it right.
By Suzsi Mandeville4 years ago in Fiction