Death by Panda

She had to get this presentation right. Do a shit job? It could all go tits up.

God, she was tired. She'd been looking at the screen forever, trying to wrangle boring facts and statistics into something that was entertaining. She just couldn't do it.

More coffee needed. It was going to be a long night.

*

The strong darkness of the coffee enlivened her and she made some headway. She just needed to do some tweaks. Maybe add a video? People loved videos. She started to scroll and found something she could use from a YouTuber called "Death by Spreadsheet."

Alongside this was "Death by Panda". Her late night mind was struggling but curiosity got the better of her. Hopefully not a weird snuff film or macabre panda battle. Instead, she was greeted by the delightful black and white bears, careering down slopes, pushing themselves into spaces, legs waving, climbing trees and generally rolling around in a cute fashion. She found herself smiling, the music used a James Bond-esque rock song suggesting pandas were going to take over the world. The incongruity of it compared to the pandas' ineptitude was charming.

She felt instantly relaxed, her eyes starting to droop. She took one last look at her presentation, made some alterations bleary-eyed and yawning, and decided it was fine.

*

"And so, as this short video will hopefully consolidate, as set out in my presentation, not everything in black and white makes sense until it's been given close scrutiny."

Satisfied, she set the video "Figure Management: Making Sense Of Statistics" to go when she was horrified to see, on the screen, pandas she had watched the night before rolling around in their random way as "Death by Panda" blasted from the conference room's speakers.

What to do? Bluff it out or run frantically to turn it off? She decided her blustering around would do more damage and stood, clenching, while it played, like it had always been part of the plan.

When the laughs started and her boss complimented her afterwards on "What a stroke of genius it was. Quite unique!", she decided to donate to the World Wildlife Fund that very day.

***

364 words

I don't know about you but when I trawl through Facebook, my feed is filled with dross a lot of the time but occasionally a gem lands which needs my immediate attention.If it involves pandas, I'm opening that reel up.

I love pandas. I can remember watching "Madam Secretary" and Russell, the Chief of Staff, I think, watching panda videos to lower his blood pressure. I'm with him. I find them wonderful.

Recently, a panda reel to the music below kept me beguiled on multiple occasions. Unfortunately, I can't share it as it's on Facebook and the link won't work which is a shame as you really are missing out.

But here is a link to the music. The internet is full of panda videos although the music added an extra charm to the footage that kept me coming back for more. I dislike those that choose goofy music that makes pandas seem like lumbering, foolish beasts to mock; this reel was a lighthearted tribute to the power of pandas and how they should not be underestimated but done in a playful fashion.

Also, see if you can get this tune out of your head once you've heard it.

Death by Panda!

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