adoption
Adoption proves that sometimes, you can choose your family; all about the process before, during and after adoption.
I Belong
I was born in Vancouver BC, Canada far away from my "home" village of Alert Bay, BC (home of the Namgis First Nations). My mother was a widow very early in her life, after having two children with her late husband. At 19 years old she gave birth to me in hiding and quickly returned to Alert Bay. She left so quickly she forgot to sign the paperwork to give me up for adoption. The Social Worker had to fly up and get her signature before I could be released. The hospital had thought my "new" dad was my "real" dad as they were both fishermen on the coast of BC and tall and skinny. My new family is Caucasian and I had a older brother by three years. My brothers name is Benjamin and he had blond straight hair and blue eyes, opposite of me with Brown curly hair and brown eyes. I was deeply loved in my new home and we lived fairly well. Growing up, I always felt different, I felt I was treated different, acted different, and most of all looked different. When I was 10 years old, my parents had a daughter and her name is Sophia. Directly after Sophia's birth my parents separated and then divorced. All three of us kids felt differently about the divorce, but we all found it difficult. The way my parents disciplined me and the rules they kept were odd to me. I could feel it inside that some rules did not make sense to me and I really had no idea why. Most things felt different to me so I just got used to being different. For many years I ignored that I was First Nations and was in very little contact if any with other First Nations people or culture. My parents tried to teach me but I just wanted to be like my siblings and pushed it away. I had a hard time learning in school and there was talk about me possibly having learning disability or FAS, or ADHD, we were not given any previous medical history. I became a successful Chef for 10 years that ended in a traumatic car accident that left my right ankle fused with 6 inch plate and a huge screw directly up my heal. I was devastated because I found something I loved and that I was good at. After a lengthy rehabilitation, I re-trained and went to Post secondary school. I graduated with my B.S.W. and then shortly after my M.S.W. I had a strong feeling that I wanted to help "MY" people. I worked about three years in or around First Nation reserves within BC. I wanted to learn more about my culture and my language and felt this way I could earn money and learn at the same time. I was completely wrong. I did not understand reserves and all the hurt my people had endured. I was horrified. I had to deal with an incest case and followed it through courts for 2 years. My mental capacity was shot and I started to breakdown from not looking after myself. I turned to drugs. Went to treatment at the Woman's Hospital in Vancouver for 3 months. For the most part it was successful, a few slips here and there. I relocated to Victoria, BC. After five years of living off disability, being homeless, living in shelters, and being unstable I met THE most beautiful man I have ever met. His eyes radiated me, his smile, his laugh, his identical sense of humor....yes, identical! He accepted me for me. He is First Nations but grew up in the states. His family escaped from residential school and ended up in USA. He has lived in Victoria for many years now. He gave me the biggest gift of all in my life, a sense that I belonged somewhere. Something about him made me feel safe, welcomed, and protected, and I knew he would be in my life, at whatever capacity, till the end. I couldn't get enough of him, we were like two peas in a pod, always having fun, laughing lots, and I knew I could trust him. We have walked completely different lives, even at opposite sides of the spectrum, yet there was a deep connection. I saw this connection right from the start, but it took him many deep conversations to realize that we both have similar feelings about our upbringing which has really shaped who were are today. Whatever happens between us, he completes me. Having met him, I feel complete, like he was my missing piece. My tattoo above represents my clan, the Thunderbird, and he represents the Bear claw. May we always be respectful and loyal. Gilakas'la.
By Zoe Le Fevre5 years ago in Families
The Many Adventures of the Hero Monello and the Princess Davina
Once upon a time, not so long ago, in a land not so far away, there lived a hero and a princess. The hero was tall and strong with eyes of green and gold. The princess was fair of skin with eyes as green as the grass. She was kind, graceful, and brave. The hero and the princess shared many amazing adventures, but every story must have a beginning; this is theirs.
By Danielle Helton5 years ago in Families
Adopted and Raised by Two Moms
My story began when...well, I guess when I was born? I was born in 2002 in China when the One Child Law was still in force. I am one of the abandoned children under that ridiculous law created to control the overpopulation. It was definitely not a success; orphanages mainly filled with baby girls since boys were preferred, because they'd be the ones to provide for the family whilst the girl, when she'll marry, she'll leave the household to provide for her husband's family.
By Sheela-Sati Ségal5 years ago in Families
Help Me, I'm in Foster Care
As a person who has experienced many differing roles dealing with children that are "in the system," I have grown to lean and understand the frustrations that challenge the homes of foster and adoptive families alike. Many times we setup services to aid children in care; however, that family's entire unit is affected as well. The mom, dad, children, extended family, church, and even pets undergo life altering events. I am utilizing this book to tell their stories, their cries, their joys, their wishes, and their needs in the form of letters.
By Tenio Cousin5 years ago in Families
It is Forever
The buzzing noise threatened to kick my anxiety into overdrive. I was laying on the white vinyl chair with my head turned away from my newest friend, Damon. I did not watch him set up, I did not see if the needle was clean, I forgot to look and see if he was wearing gloves. I was probably making a mistake. I was making a mistake. This was a mistake. Why do people even get tattoos? What am I doing? This. Is. Forever.
By Amy Whatley Mallett5 years ago in Families
Mr. K's Umbrella
I still remember that day last year like it was yesterday. I just left the office for the day and the air had a tropical feel to it; I could smell the storm brewing. The warmth combined with the breeze felt wonderful after a long day of work. My day didn’t start out great; running late in the morning, I forgot my tote bag which had my umbrella and walking shoes in it. The forecast said a storm was coming. It was shortly after 5 pm. I looked down at my stilettos, those damn heels that I loved so much. Just as I was thinking about whether I would make it to the bus stop, a block and a half away; thunder broke and it began to pour.
By Marilyn Glover5 years ago in Families
Kumamoto Sakura
When I was a year-and a half, I was adopted from Japan and I grew up in Hawaii as an only child. In Spring 2008, I went to Kumamoto, Japan to meet my birth mother, Mitsuko for the first time. I was 39 at the time, and had never seen her before, not even a photo of her in all those years.
By Caryl Leroh5 years ago in Families
From an adoptive parent during the "black lives matter" movement
The "Black lives matter" movement brings a bit of hope for my child's future. To be honest, my decision never came easy. I knew it would never be an easy fight, but my wish for us to be family was my fuel. I think and overthink all the scenarios that can or might be happening to him. Some can be upsetting. Because of that, I try desperately to prepare him. Many times my decision to "take him from his home" was misjudged. There'll always be people to comment on what you do, no matter what you do and without knowing facts. My focus is not on that kind of people. Yours shouldn't be on them, also. My focus is on Karim, my family, my friends and trying to make everything work for us, fairly.
By Corina G. Prutean6 years ago in Families
I’m Adopted!
The coolest fact about me is that I am adopted. For some reason people think that’s really rare and interesting. I guess I don’t see it as interesting because it was a normal thing for me. I always knew that another woman gave birth to me and gave me and my sister up so we could have better lives. It is something that I am very thankful for because my life growing up was amazing. I had two parents who loved me even though I wasn’t their’s biologically. They gave my sister and I the best life possible! Fun fact: my sister and I are actual blood sisters, adopted from the same family, but at different times! Kind of cool, right?
By Taylor Hagemann6 years ago in Families
