The Riddle of Rayne

There was a grey overcast haunting the sky, congested with storm clouds brewing by the second.

Rayne felt the sand, slightly cold from the fall chill hanging in the air. The pieces fell through her fingers, never staying within the palm of her grasp, almost as if they became dismembered at the touch of her hand.

The ocean played relentlessly in front of her; its lively spirit mocking her unraveling being.

The salty aroma filled her lungs with a bitter and hungry yearning to scream. Scream and release the pressure building in her chest; scream and let out all her frustrations, until her lungs emptied, and blood saturated the back of her throat.

The waves hit the shoreline as if in a ploy of seduction. As the water kissed the sand, over and over again, it whispered her name ever so slightly. Rayne. Rayne. Rayne.

The flowing movement beckoned her to come dance inside the current. Fall deep into the abyss of its waters, let the sea cleanse her, and become a part of its vastness.

She remained still, paralyzed by the reality of what would happen if the ocean greeted the paralyzed limbs before them. Her eyes glazed upon the two heavy rocks which exhibited the dilemma of free will. Her fingertips softly running along the smooth exterior.

Here she sat, exploiting time, and insulting the loud beating in her chest, the silver lining between life and death. It vibrated throughout her body, as if in a desperate attempt to claim its territory: acknowledge its presence, state its purpose, and bear what she held within.

It’s quite loud, almost overbearing, and interrupting my collisions with the sand.

Rayne closed her eyes, let herself fall back, and tried to simply breathe, trying to force the air slowly in and slowly out. She could feel her spirit flowing, mimicking the grace of the moving clouds above her. She could feel its eagerness to be set free so it could fly alongside the wind and join the others as they helped push the waves to shore.

Her body mimicked a casket. It served only as a cell, holding its victim captive.

The rocks began pushing themselves into her side, fighting to break the girl before she broke herself. Their pulsing pressure formed bruises on her sides as they dug themselves into her waist.

She could not unclasp the tightening grip on the choices in front of her.

She moved one rock into her left pocket and followed suit with the other.

Their final resting place?

Every time she tried to stand up, she felt their dominant weight restraining her where she sat.

Without her will or desire, she fell down the same hole she always did, as her mind claimed her as its own. Her thoughts began to swirl in sync with the flow of the waves, memories crashing just as the water hit the sand, again, and again, in its unforgiving manner.

The first time she held her baby sister.

Listening to the disappointment over her desire to forgo college.

Looking into the mirror only to be met with a reflection she hated.

Throwing out her lunch every day at school but saving her father’s handwritten notes.

Waking up to the sound of a honking vehicle as it sped by, infuriated at the oblivious driver before them.

Sitting alone in the corner of the gymnasium, watching as all her peers poured their way inside, quickly finding a seat waiting for them.

Cradling Buster as she rocked back and forth, sobbing into his fur.

Staring at the table full of cheerleaders, picking apart their bodies, deciding which pieces of them she would keep for herself and which parts she would throw away.

Pulling into the driveway, only to reverse and leave, driving to no place in particular, just away.

Listening to the beautiful girl to her left complain about her perfect, slender figure. Rayne resented her ungratefulness at possessing everything she dreamed of having.

Watching the love of her life fall for another right in front of her eyes.

Saying hi to an old classmate, only to be met with confusion and a “I’m sorry, who are you?”

Snuggling into her new bed, about to fall asleep, hearing the door creak open, feeling a figure climb on top, discard her pajamas, and begin making her growing body their own playground.

Deep inside the darkest crevice of her mind, Rayne became unaware of her surroundings, and the approaching figure in the near distance.

Rayne thought of the mother and father she would leave behind, how their heart would break beyond repair when the news found their way to them. Her little sister, how her small mind would be unable to comprehend the reality of where her older sibling would be for the rest of her days.

The daughter and sibling she once was, would no longer be coming home for the holidays. The lavender bedsheets would never be changed to a different set. Rayne’s bookshelf would remain in its current state, incomplete, with several shelves left to fill.

She would disappear into the teal, murky waters, never to be seen again, save for the other lost mortals among the sea’s edge.

Your plans are about to be spoiled.

“Ello! I thought I would be sitting in solitude this early in the morning,” the sheer abrupt speech of a strangers voice thrusted Rayne out of herself.

The volume of the ocean started blaring in her ears, the rocks pinned her to the ground, and her body started erupting in trembles.

“Oh my god, I am so terribly sorry. I did not mean to startle you.”

Rayne could hear footsteps receding, allowing her some space to collect herself. She could not find the strength to look at the stranger beside her.

“I’m Ramona, another lonely soul.”

Trying to balance her breathing and shakes, Rayne let her breaths come and go as they pleased, holding her hands tightly together as if this pressure would alleviate her quivers. She slowly turned to look at Ramona as she sat up.

She was tall, dark-skinned, and quite beautiful. Her essence radiated light; her presence seemed to be the only source of illumination on this gloomy morning. Curly, unruly hair was tangled up into a messy bun on top of Ramona’s head. Her ears were littered with different kinds of piercings, looking overstuffed with jewelry. Her eyes shined like two verdant flowers blooming anew.

“Who says I am lonely?” Rayne croaked the words out. She had not realized her voice’s disappearance along with the other receding parts of herself.

“That is true, my apologies once more. I just meant it’s not typical for anyone to be out here at this hour, on this day. Every year, I have always found myself to be the only one here.” Ramona smiled as she sat down, turning her sight away from Rayne. Her gaze met the oceans front, only to be enchanted by the recurring notion. Her perception seemed sequestered by a million thoughts, leaving behind residue of a tortured glare.

Rayne grasped the sides of her pockets, clutching the rocks, hoping their appearance went unnoticed.

“This was my best friend’s favorite spot on the entire island. I never really saw the beauty to it, till she was not here to explain it to me.” Ramona’s voice suddenly began to falter and crack, its perfect harmony slowly collapsing into itself.

And you thought you were the only one who found this spot to be so alluring. The ocean jeered at Rayne.

“My best friend died at this exact time, three years ago.” Ramona softly expelled the words through a whisper. The pain was still strikingly apparent, even after several years’ time. Rayne could see the tears bubbling up and glossing over Ramona’s eyes. She saw her lips begin to tremble as Ramona pulled her knees in as if trying to trap the memory of her lost best friend.

Perhaps, the sight of her frolicking in the waves was just at the edge of the ocean, just as Rayne saw another variant of herself flying inside the salty display.

Ramona looked at the ocean as if it held all her answers. As if it could heal her, in the same way Rayne desired to be cleansed.

Between you two, who could it be

Ramona sees far beyond out at sea

Her best friend who is free

Shall you leave thee to be

Why don’t you finally come join my dance with me

“Tell me about her, if you want.” Rayne cut off the devilish words taunting her, offering her ear and company, for she did not have much else. She hated apologizing for someone’s loss, despised giving condolences. What did they ever do for someone grieving? Besides remind them of their sorrow.

“Okay. You can tell me what you are hiding inside your pockets, afterward, if you would like.” Ramona glanced back at Rayne, setting her eyes directly on her, burning straight through the very riddle which was her life.

Suddenly above, the clouds yelled in agony as they parted ways, paving room for a break of sunlight and signaling the oncoming rain shower.