Small

The lights of the city lit up the night sky. Looking down at the city from just outside city limits, staring out of my tiny bedroom window. I saw the beauty of the city lights, sparkling and alive at the stroke of midnight. I then looked up at the constellations who have been telling stories for years. The sky and its stories slowly dripped down and met the earth’s land. The horizon was lighter from the city’s own stars. As if mortal beings like us humans could cast shadows on the heavens above. How ridiculous us humans truly sometimes try to be. We try to run for the hills, climb the highest of mountains, discover the bottoms of the oceans, and the wonders of outer space. How hard we truly try to become more then what we really are… We are but one in billions, we are but microscopic critters compared to the universe. Sometimes we forget about that. We forget how small we are at times. But there are moments in a lifetime, that can open one’s eyes, that can truly cause one to see and believe that though we are small, we are but part of something much bigger than ourselves.

We can feel this way when we stand before the ocean. I know for myself personally, I can feel like something tinier than a fly, but more powerful than the sun. The waves lapping against the soft clean sandy beach. The way the sky meets the ocean, and the sound of the calming waves. Then there’s the smell; the smell of the salty water reaching the nostrils as someone would breathe in deep into their lungs. The gentle ocean can calm one’s soul, my soul, but it can also cause fear. The strength of the oceans currents and pulling waves could cause a life. But it reminds you how fragile you are, and how small you are, but how amazing the world is and can be. How it can be completely relaxing to be next to for one minute, and the next you need to stay far from it to stay safe. This is what can remind me how fragile a life can be. How fragile the world is, but how dangerous it also can be.

Then there are the sand dunes. The large rolling sandy hills that seemed to go on for miles. I remember visiting those intimidating landscapes before. I was on a trip visiting some friends up in Argentina, and they desperately wanted to take me to the Duna Federico Kirbus. These are said to be the largest sand dunes in the world. My friends took me there as they said it was the most eye-opening landscape in nature that they’ve ever seen. It sounded intriguing, so I went with them. I have always loved adventure and seeing the wonders of nature that live on this planet that we humans call home. The way the critters swim in the ocean, fly gracefully up in the clouds, or even how a common animal like a dog is so incredibly intelligent, that they understand each other and humans. The world had given me tons of reasons to feel small but feel somehow part of something much larger.

That experience in the sand dunes in Argentina made me feel even more small. I felt like an ant crawling underneath a human’s foot. Like a piece of krill floating around, unable to compare itself to the wide and vast blue oceans. The feeling of being alone but being needed and wanted was overwhelming. I remember standing on the top of a sandy hill in the desert. The dunes went as far as the eyes could see, and the dome above had not a single cloud, only a bright ball of fire that burned to look at. My friends were standing beside me, enjoying the sun above our heads and the sand beneath our feet. It was as if only I noticed the infinite overwhelming sense of seeming small. So, there I stood, completely engulfed in the moment. Engulfed in the desert's parched silence, I was nothing but another grain of sand in the wind.