I HATE PIGEONS!

The CLAT (Common Law Admission Test) exam is a national-level entrance examination in India, conducted annually for admission to undergraduate and postgraduate law programs at 22 National Law Universities (NLUs) across the country. The exam is taken by thousands of aspiring law students every year, with the number of test-takers exceeding 80,000 in recent years. The CLAT exam is considered one of the most challenging law entrance exams in India, testing a student's aptitude in areas such as English, mathematics, logical reasoning, and general knowledge. The exam's competitive nature and rigorous evaluation process make it a daunting task for even the most prepared students.

My journey to cracking the CLAT exam began when I was in the 12th standard. Up until that point, I was uncertain about my future and didn't have a clear vision for my life. But everything changed when a friend introduced me to the CLAT exam, which as you know now is the entrance exam for law schools in India. I was intrigued by the idea of pursuing a career in law and decided to learn more about it.As I researched the CLAT exam online, I became increasingly fascinated by the world of law. I realized that a career in law would not only be challenging and rewarding but also provide me with a sense of purpose and fulfillment. Moreover, I felt that studying law would help me develop valuable skills such as critical thinking, problem-solving, and communication.

However, I was also aware that I had certain personality traits that might hold me back. As a shy and introverted person, I often struggled to express myself and assert my opinions. But I was determined to overcome these limitations and become a more confident and articulate individual.That's why I decided to take the plunge and start preparing for the CLAT exam. I enrolled in online coaching classes, which was a new experience for me. At first, I was unfamiliar with the exam pattern and wasn't sure where my studies were leading me. I had never taken any coaching classes before, and this was my first time exploring the world beyond my comfort zone.Despite the initial uncertainty, I wanted to make the most of this opportunity. Determined to change my reputation from an average student to excellent one..I was eager to learn, grow, and transform myself into a more confident and capable individual.

When I embarked on this journey, I was taken aback to discover that the exam was just three months away. To make matters worse, I was woefully unprepared and didn't even grasp the significance of this exam. I felt like a novice, navigating uncharted territory, and my inexperience made me feel like a little kid struggling to keep up.As a result, I was extremely hesitant to take the exam, and this hesitation, coupled with my nervousness, would ultimately prove to be a costly mistake in the years to come.

After deciding not to take the CLAT exam that year, I vowed to prepare rigorously for the next attempt. Following my 12th standard exams, where I scored around 90%, my parents began searching for colleges near our home. However, I was disinterested in these options.My father advised me to take a year off, focus on my goal,because it will ultimately decide my future. This was a pivotal decision, as it meant taking a break from academics and potentially delaying my future plans. In Indian culture, there's often pressure on women to get married by a certain age, so taking a year off at 18 was a bold move.

This decision proved to be a turning point, as it allowed me to regroup and refocus on my studies. I enrolled in offline coaching classes, where I met three incredible friends, Hinushi , Urjashvi and sanwari who remain close to me to this day. And now I couldn't even imagine my life without them.

Enrolling in the coaching classes exposed me to the real world, teaching me valuable skills like interaction and communication. My friends, Hinushi and Urjasvi, played a significant role in helping me adapt to this new environment. Initially, I was anxious, but I quickly adjusted to the new surroundings. Other dear friend sanwari taught me some of the most significant life lessons and made me realize the importance of mental health. As I delved deeper into my CLAT preparation, I realized that my approach was flawed. Having come from an Indian education system that emphasizes rote learning, I assumed that the CLAT exam would be similar. I focused on reading and learning material, but I struggled with mathematics, which was a weak subject for me. Despite my efforts, I found the faculty's guidance inadequate, leading to frustration and fear.

Given that mathematics accounted for only 20 marks out of 150, I decided to drop the subject altogether. Many students didn't attempt mathematics, so I followed suit. Instead, I relied on the study material provided by the coaching center and employed the same tactics I used during my 12th standard exams.By the end of the year, I felt prepared, having taken numerous mock tests at the coaching center. Although I had studied diligently, my innocence about the competition's intensity proved to be my downfall. I underestimated the need to study extremely hard to outperform others.The consequences of my misjudgment became apparent when I took the exam and failed to secure a seat in my desired colleges. The disappointment was crushing, leaving me heartbroken.

The news of not securing a seat in my desired colleges was a devastating blow. I was consumed by an overwhelming sense of sadness, distress, and disappointment. The intensity of my emotions was unprecedented, as I had never experienced rejection before. Having worked tirelessly towards my goal, the setback was particularly hard to accept. For ten days, I withdrew from the world, unable to muster the strength to interact with anyone. Sleep became my escape, a temporary reprieve from the anguish that gripped my heart. My faith was shaken, and I struggled to come to terms with the harsh reality. The question 'how could this happen to me?' echoed in my mind, a constant reminder of my perceived failure.

The pain of rejection was exacerbated by the fact that it was my first experience of not achieving something I had worked so hard for and the fact that each and every person in my wast family knew that I was preparing for this exam (thanks to my mother for opening up to each and every family member she met though she though that it was a proud thing for her but little did she knew her daughter won't qualify that year) . The struggle to calm myself was real, and it took immense effort to slowly pick up the pieces and begin the process of healing , afterall you know how indian relatives are ....don't spare a single opportunity to let others children down.....so it was extremely hard for me.

As the days passed, I gradually began to interact with people again and started talking to them. My father played a pivotal role in strengthening my resolve, and our morning conversations helped lift my spirits. He encouraged me, saying, 'You can do it! If not once, try twice or thrice. I'll support you every step of the way.' His unwavering support helped me overcome my initial setback.However, the fear of failure lingered, and the memory of my first attempt at the CLAT exam continued to haunt me. I would often cry at night, feeling overwhelmed and uncertain about my future. But then, a relative suggested that I enroll in a government college, which would allow me to take exams without attending regular classes. I decided to fill out the form for Maharani College in Jaipur, ensuring that the next year wouldn't be wasted.

With this new development, I now had two tasks at hand: preparing for the Maharani College exams and continuing my preparation for the CLAT exam. I decided to take a different approach this time, trying out various coaching materials and studying everything I could get my hands on. I was determined to crack mathematics, a subject that had previously intimidated me.A quote I read somewhere resonated deeply with me: 'Someone's maximum is someone's minimum.' These words inspired me to push beyond my limits. I started studying late into the night, thinking to myself, 'One more hour, please. I'm getting ahead of hundreds of people with every hour I study.

That year was a transformative period for me. As I continued on my journey, I discovered a new passion for reading novels. I became so enamored with books that I now have a collection of over 70, and I've read each one cover to cover. Some books I devoured in just one day, which is a testament to the power of reading. I often wonder why I wasn't introduced to books earlier in my life; I would have read so many more.The year 2024 was particularly significant, as it opened my senses and helped me grow as a person. However, it was also a year marked by loss. I lost one of my childhood best friend and another very dear friend. While I don't want to delve into the details, I do miss them both deeply specially the not so childhood friend ...we had a crazy chemistry anyways. But despite the pain of their absence, I've come to accept that circumstances change, and everyone has their own pov , but we should learn how to move on.During this challenging time, I was already dealing with exam stress, and the added strain of broken friendships took a toll on me. But then I discovered journaling, which became a lifesaver. Through journaling, I gained a deeper understanding of myself and developed a valuable practice of introspection. Journaling helped me process my emotions and navigate the ups and downs of life.

Journaling has been a game-changer for me. It's helped me process my emotions, gain clarity on my thoughts, and develop a deeper understanding of myself. By putting my experiences and feelings down on paper, I've been able to, Release pent-up emotions and tensions,Identify patterns and habits that hold me back,Celebrate my achievements and progress, Develop a more compassionate and kind relationship with myself.Through journaling, I've discovered a sense of calm, clarity, and purpose. It's become an essential part of my self-care routine, and I highly recommend it to anyone looking to cultivate a deeper connection with themselves.

I've come to realize that the happiness of those around me brings me joy. I've learned the invaluable lesson of moving on from sorrow and focusing on the moments that bring a smile to my face.The year 2024 has been a transformative period for me. I've undergone significant personal growth, and I'm now a confident individual with a clear vision for my life. I've developed the ability to initiate conversations with anyone and express myself without hesitation.My journey towards a clearer goal began in April or May of that year. The initial four months were challenging, as I struggled to cope with the fear of failure and the loss I had experienced. However, I gave myself time to process my emotions and reflect on what had happened.When I restarted my journey, I was determined to crack the exam. The exam pattern had changed, requiring me to attempt only 120 questions, with 12 marks allocated to mathematics. Since math was my weakness, I decided to take separate tuitions for the subject.I consulted with Paridhi ma'am, one of my teachers at the coaching center. She's an exceptional teacher, kind, and sweet. She played a significant role in helping me develop a love for math. I would spend hours solving math problems, and time would fly by unnoticed. Paridhi ma'am's guidance was instrumental in shaping my journey. I solved mock tests from various coaching centers, learned from different study materials, and even read newspapers daily to stay updated. I developed a habit of writing letters to the editor, which became a therapeutic activity for me.

I established a morning routine that began with waking up early, followed by a morning walk with my father. Although he's busy nowadays, I've taken to cycling alone in the morning. Previously, our walks were filled with lively discussions on various topics, from politics and culture to family matters. Our conversations were unpredictable, yet enriching, and played a significant role in helping me overcome challenges.My bond with my father grew stronger, and I felt comfortable sharing anything with him. This feeling of openness and trust is truly special. After our morning walks, I'd have breakfast while reading the newspaper, staying informed about current events. As a person of faith, I also made it a point to visit the nearby temple. My devotion to God has been a constant source of comfort, and I firmly believe that He has a plan to bring good into my life. This faith has been a guiding force, helping me navigate life's journey.

Next, I'd create a to-do list, outlining the tasks I needed to complete. I was diligent about finishing everything on my list before sleeping. This routine helped me stay focused and productive.When I needed a break, I'd watch informative YouTube videos that expanded my knowledge. Additionally, I dedicated two hours every day to improving my reading speed, as the CLAT exam requires rapid reading comprehension.With only 120 minutes to answer 120 questions, every minute counted. To simulate the actual exam experience, I'd solve coaching mocks at home during the same time slot as the CLAT exam, from 2 to 4 pm. Sitting in my room, I felt well-prepared for the challenge ahead. However, life had a surprise in store for me, one that I wasn't prepared for – but that's a story for later....

There were moments when I broke down, overwhelmed by emotions I couldn't quite explain. Tears would fall unintentionally, a release of the pent-up feelings I'd been carrying. But with time, these episodes became less frequent, and I started feeling more positive with each passing day. My determination to succeed in the exam was unwavering. I made sacrifices, skipping family events and ignoring social invitations. People would wonder why I wasn't attending gatherings, but I didn't let their opinions distract me. I became reclusive, spending most of my time in my room, glued to my study table. The outside world faded into the background as I immersed myself in my studies, focused solely on achieving my goal. My reading habit has been a game-changer, significantly improving my English skills, comprehension, and even speaking abilities. I've devoured numerous self-help books, but my true passion lies in thriller and mystery novels. I'm particularly fond of Freida Mcfadden works – she's an exceptional writer, and I simply adore her books.Reading has become an integral part of my life, and I was thrilled to attend the Jaipur Literature Festival earlier this month. It was an incredible experience, and I thoroughly enjoyed it. The festival was a testament to the power of literature, and I felt inspired being surrounded by fellow book lovers and renowned authors.I also interacted with some very inquisitive people,I felt great, it was a good experience...

As I reflect on my journey, I clearly remember the day that will make a big difference in my life in coming years - December 2, 2024 which was the EXAM DAY!. I was a nervous wreck, plagued by irrelevant thoughts and unable to relax. Sleep evaded me the night before, and I knew I had to calm my nerves.I recall telling myself to stay cool and focused. I put on a brave face, joking with my parents in the car as we headed to the exam center at Subodh College, jaipur . But beneath the surface, I was a bundle of nerves.

As I stepped out of the car and was walking towards my center , my parents wished me luck, and I felt a wave of anxiety wash over me. I took a deep breath, reminding myself that I had prepared hard for this moment. As I sat down at my desk, determined to give it my all.The exam began, and I was relieved to find it easier than expected. But I knew that meant the competition would be fierce. I focused on answering every question correctly, pouring all my energy into the exam. Just as I was getting into my rhythm, disaster struck. A pigeon, seemingly out of nowhere, landed on my head, causing chaos around me. The other students were frightened, and the invigilators were shocked. I, on the other hand, was furious.

I shouted for help, trying to shoo the pigeon away. The invigilators asked me to stand up and try to gently remove the bird, but I refused, knowing that every minute counted. I pleaded with them to understand the importance of this exam, and eventually, they let me continue.The pigeon continued to flutter around me, sometimes landing on my exam paper or beside my chair. It was a surreal experience, but I refused to let it distract me. I pushed through, determined to succeed.

The chaos caused by the pigeon's sudden appearance was unprecedented. The other students were frightened, and I was livid. The invigilators tried to restore order, asking us to stand up while they called someone to remove the bird. Precious minutes ticked away, and I watched in frustration as my time slipped away.I appealed to the invigilator to grant me a few extra minutes to compensate for the lost time, but he refused, citing protocol. I was devastated. With only minutes left on the clock, I was left with four or five unanswered questions that I was confident I could have answered correctly if only I had a bit more time.As the bell rang, signaling the end of the exam, I felt a wave of despair wash over me. I couldn't shake the feeling that the pigeon had ruined my chances of securing a seat at a top law college. It seemed absurd that a small bird could have such a profound impact on my future, but the reality was stark – every minute counted, and every mark could make a difference in my ranking.

The competition was fierce, with over 100,000 candidates vying for just 2000 seats. I knew that even a small mistake could cost me dearly. As I left the exam center, I couldn't help but wonder what could have been if only that pigeon had not appeared........Time passed and...

Result day finally arrived, and I was a bundle of nerves. I had also given the AILET paper for Delhi Law College, but my heart was set on securing a seat through CLAT. As I opened my laptop at 6 pm, my father by my side, I felt my anxiety spike.When I saw my rank, I was decent but not satisfied. I had expected more, especially since I had consistently ranked among the top 5 or 10 in my coaching. The disappointment hit me hard, and I broke down in tears.

In a fit of anger or you can say dissatisfaction , I told my father, that I hadn't cleared the exam. But my father, calm and reassuring as always, reminded me that there were still options available. He encouraged me to explore other colleges, but I couldn't shake off the feeling of disappointment. I had pinned my hopes on securing a top rank, and the reality was hard to swallow. As the saying goes, 'expectations kill.' But I had created realistic expectations for myself, and the result was a crushing sense of disappointment. Despite my father's reassurances, I couldn't help but feel that I had fallen short. Securing a seat in a Decent National Law University (NLU) was a pleasure for many students, but for me, it was a consolation prize. I had aimed for the stars, and the fact that I hadn't reached them was hard to accept.

While securing a seat in any National Law University (NLU) is a prestigious achievement, with only 24 NLUs in India, I couldn't shake off the feeling that I had missed out on the top colleges. Getting into any NLU is a remarkable feat, but my aspirations were set higher. I knew that I had secured a seat in an NLU, but the knowledge that I hadn't made it to the top colleges lingered, leaving me with a sense of discontent. The pride and satisfaction that come with getting into a reputable NLU were overshadowed by my unfulfilled expectations.

The next day, I revealed the truth to my father - I had indeed secured a seat in a National Law University (NLU). My father's response was calm and wise. 'Why were you so bothered?' he asked. 'You're getting an NLU, be happy about it!'And he was quite sad at the idea of me going far away from my hometown.But he went on to explain the importance of accepting what life has to offer. 'God wants something good for you,' he said. 'You should accept things as they are. It's okay that you didn't get a top university. Be grateful that you got one at all.' He reminded me that many people don't even get a single NLU offer, and that I was among the lucky 2,000 who did. His words struck a chord. I realized that acceptance is a valuable lesson, one that I had learned the hard way. After all the sacrifices and hard work I had put in, it was tough to accept that I hadn't made it to a top university. But my father's words helped me see things in perspective. Acceptance is not always easy, but it's a crucial part of moving forward.

That pigeon still evokes strong emotions in me. I must admit, I hate that pigeon with a passion. In fact, I've developed a strong dislike for all pigeons because of that one incident. My father, on the other hand, loves feeding pigeons when we visit the Jharkhand Mahadev temple, but I now find it hard to tolerate the idea. I'm not sure why, but that pigeon's untimely interruption has left a lasting impression on me. I've never felt such intense dislike for anything or anyone before. The memory of that pigeon still gets my blood boiling, and I'm reminded of the significance of that day and how it could have changed the course of my life.

As I prepare to embark on this new chapter of my life at a National Law University (NLU), I'm still awaiting the counseling process, scheduled to take place in June or July this year. The wait is palpable, but one thing remains constant - my lingering disdain for that pesky pigeon. The memory of its ill-timed interruption still lingers, a reminder of the unpredictable twists and turns that life can take , how a person can change and be a completely different person in just a couple of months. It's fascinating to think about how differently things might have turned out if that pigeon hadn't interrupted me. Perhaps I would have secured a seat in a different National Law University. The mere thought of wasting another year was unbearable, and I'm relieved that it didn't come to that.

This concludes my story of how I came to despise pigeons. Every student's journey to competitive exams is unique, and this is mine. Thanks for reading, and I bid you adieu!

and I'm definitely going to hate pigeons for the rest of my life......