Backroom Cat Nap

THE 1ST DRAFT

Warehouse Backroom Cat Nap

“This is the stockroom warehouse where we keep our surplus. The most common items are stored up front. The whole place is basically a twisting tunnel of eclectic furniture. Most of the floor displays are directly for sale, but we keep extra stock in here. It’s primarily mattresses.”

“This is where I come to take a nap,” Jake joked.

“Don’t nap on any of let management catch you napping on any of these. We do have a mattress by the warehouse office in storeroom 13 that we can’t sell though. Follow me,” Janice said.

“I was just kidding,” Jake said.

“No, it’s really okay. You are allowed to take a short nap on your lunch break if you need to. Just set an alarm so that you clock back in on time.”

Janice showed Jake to a queen-sized mattress outside the warehouse manager’s office in storeroom 13. It was lumpy and old and to the right side was the perfect human-shaped indentation impression.

“I can see where everyone naps on it,” Jake pointed to the indent.

“Actually, if anyone ever uses it, they use the other side. No one really knows how long that mattress has been here and we all have our own theories. I think someone tried to return the mattress after their grandma died and left that indent in it. I’m not sure why Mr. Thabit Fibonacci hasn’t just tossed it.”

“Gross,” Jake said.

“Anyway, that’s the tour. Welcome to [FURNITURE STORE] Thabit’s Fibonacci’s Furniture Flea Emporium, the largest selection of custom and brand unique name furniture in all of Pteetneet City.”

The job was a straightforward sales job and Jake was very successful right off the bat. He was always on time, polite and cheerful with customers, and made his daily sales goals before lunch.

About two weeks into the job he found himself working a shift with a severe lack of sleep after significant insomnia. By the time lunch came he was ready to clock out and consider the mattress in the warehouse for a quick thirty minute snooze.

Jake laid down on the clear side of the mattress and closed his eyes, but couldn’t seem to find himself falling asleep. He opened his eyes and looked at the human-shaped impression. He had to admit that it looked like a comfortable spot on the bed. Before he knew it, Jake was sliding like a glove into the cushy form.

The spot was warm and soft. The tight fit was a comforting hug from all of his loved ones at once. As he wriggled deeper into its moist embrace it felt like a dozen of individual fingers giving him a message around his entire body all at once. Jake drifted swiftly into a deep sleep as the mattress, much like a starfish, enveloped him in its external stomach.

“Janice! Oh, Janice!”

“Yes, Mr. Fibonacci?”

“That new guy has missed all his shifts for the last three days. How do we keep having so many employees leaving without notice?”

“I don’t know Mr. Fibonacci. Do you want me to put up the Help Wanted sign back up?”

“O gods, we’re gonna have to,” said Mr. Fibonacci.

THE CRITIQUE

My process generally starts around 11pm to 3am. I wake from a dead sleep having the remnants of a dream or a half-formed thought on the top of my tongue and I pop open my phone and jot down a note:

I then move into the stage I like to call, "thinking about it for several days before writing anything." This stage can last anywhere as low as three days and up to twenty years.

I like to throw a title onto a piece to give myself a jumping off point. I started this piece off believing I would make it take place in a big name furniture warehouse type situation, but the more I got into it I realized I needed to make it more of a kooky bizaar style store that oozes indie grunge.

First sentencing is hard. I just toss something in there to get me going. Once I have a flow I will come back and change the first sentence several times before I'm satisfied with a catchy opening.

Jake and Janice: who the fuck are these people? I don't know. These are just my template names. I have learned that I can obsess over finding the right name. What does the name mean? Should it relate to the story or provide insight into their character? Is there an anagram mean? Seriously, I have spent days on this.

Example: Madame Lunette Forrel made her first debut in The Myriad Fortune Teller. She has since grown to be a favorite of mine, making a few other appearances including an in-process novel. Lunette Forrel is an anagram.

Jake and Janice will eventually be something with a seaside tone or a furniture twist.

Storeroom 13. As much as I can obsess over the right names, I also need to get the right numbers. What can be associated to it? Is there a superstition surrounding it? I also have a small obsession with primes.

In this instance, 13 is not just a prime number, but also an unlucky number and... a Fibonnaci prime. I like the idea of relating the Fibonnaci imagery of a seashell shape relating back to the storyline itself to involve sea creatures. (Silly little Amos-fueled easter egg.)

Which brings us to where I popped in my "stop obsessing over names" brick work of FURNITURE STORE. I thought I had a decent one with Thabit's Furniture Emporium, but ultimately I liked the illiteration of Fibonnaci's Furniture Flea.

One critique I get frequently is that I hide too much context between the lines. I've been learning to teach myself to make things much more clear. This is the reason I've bolded "much like a starfish." By the time this story is done I want the mattress monster to resemble a mattress-shaped starfish monster thriving on the bones of poor innocent furniture store employees who are pulled in and swooned to their snoozy death.

I think it is important to recognize that there are many different beliefs and many different gods. In the Pteetneet City universe it's a deliberate choice that the citizens are recognizing all the gods available. (Pteetneet being a conscious choice itself because it is significant to me as the author.)

Of course I went back and did a few grammar and spelling errors to finish this first draft off. I have had moments where I've decided the story would be better if told from a different POV. I have no problem starting from scratch to get it just right.

THE RESULTS

Yes, this piece is unfinished and far from perfect. It has a lot of review and edits and late nights of insomnia to figure out that "one last thing."

Sometimes we write and we change and we write and we change and suddenly the story we thought we were writing became a brand new beautiful thing birthed from our brains.

Whatever this story becomes, whatever it wants to become, I think I like it. I'm calling it Backroom Cat Nap for this review, but keep an eye out for Fibonacci’s Furniture Flea.

It seems like it might be a pretty cool story.

Thank you fo reading - Amos Glade

BONUS BLOOPERS

I've come to learn how to do a little AI generation for imagery to go along with my stuff. Enjoy some of these bloopers: