The Aarushi Talwar Case

I had been eager to write my perspective on this case for some time. Had not got time. Much has been spoken and written about this incident that shook India. Year 2008. A 13-year-old girl Aarushi Talwar and the family’s live-in domestic worker were murdered in the house. It led to a frenzy of media speculations, leading to the incarceration of the dentist parents Dr. Rajesh Talwar and Dr. Nupur Talwar. They denied the crime and blamed a bunch of other servants. But the case remained unresolved, and the Indian investigation was called botched.

At that time I was pursuing my PhD in India, largely occupied in the research. But from glimpses in the famous newspaper ‘The Times of India’ I had read the story, plot, and flaws.

About 15 years have elapsed. I live in California, USA, for a long time now. The case still stirs its ugly head from time to time. I have seen several interviews with the parents on YouTube. We have even seen the crime saga in a brilliant movie from ‘Talwar’. The parents have been acquitted.

Numerous crimes happen in the world. Why this case grabbed so much eyeball and media attention?

Well, the characters and the story built on them stoked sensationalism. Upperclass parents, an adolescent daughter, a lonely live-in servant, and disgruntled employees.

Now I am a parent of two kids. I want to keep them safe, and I worry about the bad peers and ugly habits, they might get into, when I am not looking.

So, I share empathy with the parents. Parenting is not easy, without social support.

Also, in the past few years, I have taught myself some robust data analysis and psychology. Both of these give me some edge to sort out the riddle from a neutral perspective.

Let’s see my perspective. Its assumption and intuition are based on some facts and knowledge of human behavior. I don’t mean to assassinate anybody’s character here.

My take on different people involved in the crime story:

The parents:

Well, after watching the interviews with the parents, I think they executed the murders. But wait, it's not that they hated the kid. They doted on her, just failed to protect her, busy with their own personal-professional priorities.

Their facial expression and body language indicated their defensive stance. The darting eyes, the hands crossed across the chest, the guilty looks, focus on other things rather than rage to nab the culprits, these are all indicators.

So, why are they playing the game of lying? Nobody likes to be in jail. It's worse than death in a way. I believe, if the servants had robbed them, or had committed other crimes, they would have had no problem approaching the police. But this is a question of honor.

I would not like to share promiscuity or sexual exploitation of a daughter! Its a shame and an attack on my honor and ego. The servant did an unpardonable crime, and the livid father, in a moment of rage, killed the daughter and the servant.

The servant:

The murdered servant’s wife in Nepal defends her husband as a good person. He would have cared for the girl as a daughter, she says. Well, in an ideal world, it should happen. But the real world is ugly and irrational.

The lonely man was away from his wife. Unfulfilled. Loneliness distorts our perception and makes us do things, we would regret later.

He was humiliated by the employer, the father of the girl. So, it made him revengeful too. It's an easy way to hurt the father.

The servant was egged on by his low-wit servant friends. This group was not expected to talk about Aristotle, but the very street-level talks. How is your boss’s hot daughter stuff?

So, the lonely, revengeful, and misled man manipulated the girl. Very unfortunate, but that’s how it must have unfolded.

The girl:

She was brilliant. But she sure spent lots of time on her own, only with the servant, as the parents worked long hours as dentists. She was an adolescent, and sexual awakening was coming fast. Even a boy tried to call her that fateful night, which shows her increasing promiscuity.

The other servant:

I saw the narco test video of another accused, the father’s ex-employee, and a friend of the dead servant. He is touted to be the murderer. He is not, just a scapegoat. he even shared in the sedated state, how the police asked him to take the blame on him.

The Police:

We know, how some police run on bribe fuels. The parents are wealthy, So, they are likely to bribe and make the police hide the evidence. The 25K the father gave them to catch the murderer going all the way to Nepal, can be interpreted as a form of bribe. Basically, the connections with people of power led to the escape of the parents. If the parents were poor or middle class, the jail would be their fate.

The detractors:

Regular family folks accused the parents of extra-marital affairs and being ruthless. While the parents are guilty, the circumstance made them do it. They were not necessarily negligent towards their daughter.

The supporters:

Some recent articles I have read tell how the parents are much in love with each other, they are warm, rebuilding their careers, and pursuing new interests. I am not surprised. After big trauma, often people achieve post-traumatic growth. Their relationship can flourish, as sharer of a common secret.

Tomorrow, they can even found a monument or establish an award in the daughter’s memory. But it will not take away that they did the instantaneous crime.

I had heard in a TED Talk ‘We hide our shame, we fix our guilt. It's exactly the shame.

These are all my views, a story woven with the solid pillars of data analysis and psychology.

I am a parent. I get angry with my kids. I fear for their safety. I know how people sabotage our plans for life. I have empathy for the parents who lost their only child, and honor, and endured many assaults.

The victim lost her life due to the lack of proper support in a major turn of her life. The servant should not have played a game with a kid. That’s it.

Remember, we are creatures of circumstances. the Inspiring tales-spinning Hemingway and comedy actor Robin Williams can die of suicide. The situation can create such a trap, that we end up committing crimes, losing everything, to regret for life.

Exercise empathy and watch out for your mind monster. Tame it.

What’s your view?