Jail Journal: Page 18

I finished off my ramen but decided to order more and chips. That is sort of self sabotage since I am already complaining about the effect of extra carbs but, I need something tasty to distract myself. Someone told me that Hillsboro is just 20 minutes away from Beaverton so, Uwajimaya Doordash is more on the table than I previously thought. Thinking of Tarako pasta sauce on tap is awesome.

Deebeelynn and I talked about tv shows and I told her about Boston Legal. I didn't sleep long before really bad gas woke me up. I don't care how embarrassing it is to be farting in a completely acoustic room is for a whole hour, it hurt my stomach to hold it in. I couldn't go back to bed easily either so, I had to do what I had to do.

A part of me is having a hard time going back to be because I am having a vistory today as well. I can't even record a dream since I barely slept. I wonder if bread would help with the farting or make it worse?

I had a dream I was living in this really cute art village. I was back in my 20s and I was worried about boys and what not. One of Lily's friends was becoming a famous artist and had a massive canvas collection of 4 pieces. They were going for like 9000 dollars. I had a tinge of jealousy but I was trying to be supportive. I think Garth was in the dream? or some guy was stringing me along similarly to him. The dream is just sort of motivating me to finish Alex's picture now.

After counting the words on a page, I can only get about 250 per side of the sheet, which means a vocal entry is worth closer to a sheet of paper than a page. Still, 20 entries is pretty good for here. I decided I'll work on my own vocal head picture too. The cards sort of advise against it but, what else is there for me to do in here? At least it will feel like I am working again.

I just heard Amy's phone isn't being charged. Thank god. Well, no... that might be worse as she might keep watching Jersey Shore or something stupid. I am struggling to daw a cat so maybe this is what the cards were warning me about. Not that it isn't a good idea, just I have no references to make sure things look correct.

I am not eactly sure how to help time go by today other than drawing though. I did get a new book to read. Maybe, I can work on reading that.

I finally got to speak to Jan and am figuring out more of what is going on. After talking to Deebeelynn too, I am wondering if Jan is sabotaging some of my chances, but the cards are pretty much saying don't get paranoid. I do know I need to press my attorney for a visit. I mean evidence-based logic is showing he is not doing as much as Jan. I need to ask him some legal questions.

I don't know how to summarize days anymore. I also am no getting enough sleep to get good or any dreams. I finally understood why some people in here say they don't dream in here. It steals your capacity to do that.

A Scottish guard helped me to answer some questions about my letter to SSA. Angel gave me her phone number and I gave Deebeelynn mine. I don't know if I'd use these numbers though...