The Threshold of Acceptance: Handling Communications in Relationships

Though I already have an answer in my mind, I still want to personally confirm the current mainstream view. I'm a 33-year-old man, and my partner is a 29-year-old woman. Both of us have stable incomes. I have over six experiences of dating, and despite a 2:8 ratio of men to women at my workplace, all my friends are men, with no opposite-sex friends. My partner has had two relationships (unverified) and many opposite-sex friends, even during our relationship, she still dines and drinks with the opposite sex, but clarifies these are purely friendships.

We've been in a long-distance relationship for about a month, introduced by a mutual acquaintance. We share similar life and value perspectives (or so I think), but our attitudes towards ex-partners and opposite sexes diverge. Personally, after I get into a relationship, I don't dine or drink alone with the opposite sex, and I limit private conversations. Since I consider my behavior unblemished, I wouldn't particularly block my ex-girlfriends on Facebook or Instagram nor would I engage in conversations with them.

Because of the distance, my partner seems quite insecure. After we started dating, she required me to report my daily schedule and asked for more control over my messaging apps, demanding to block and clear everything. She doesn't want me to have excessive conversations with opposite-sex colleagues and hints at her friends' practice, saying, "All messages from the opposite sex must be screenshot and shown to her before she decides how to reply." This left me feeling dizzy and self-doubting.

As I don't drink alcohol or have any other questionable habits, when my partner informed me that she had dined and drunk with the opposite sex twice during our relationship, I just laughed it off. I don't mind that she occasionally goes out as I don't drink myself, and I don't care whether it's with the opposite sex or not.

I'm confident about my education, experience, and looks, and I can tolerate a girlfriend who feels insecure because of me. I try my best to comply with her requests, and I would inform her of my conversations with the opposite sex. But being consistently accused of intending to hook up if the conversations are lengthy is something I can't accept.

A recent argument erupted due to my ex-girlfriend, who I haven't contacted for years, not being completely blocked on Instagram. My mother even called to reiterate her stance, and surprisingly, both mother and daughter shared the same attitude towards this matter.

Now, my girlfriend is so angry that she refuses to answer my calls and ignores my messages. Though I'm not heartbroken, I do feel somewhat depressed.

I'm willing to let my partner delete as much as she wants on my apps, and I'm okay with reporting my activities at any time. But I can't comprehend why I should screenshot and report everything, or why an argument should arise because of a girlfriend from years ago with whom I haven't been in contact...

What level of control over communication apps can you accept from your significant other?