Reed Alexander
Bio
I'm a horror author and foulmouthed critic of all things horror. New reviews posted every Sunday.
@ReedsHorror on TikTok, Blue Sky, Instagram, YouTube, and Mastodon.
Check out my books at reedshorror.com
Stories (317)
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Reed Alexander's Literary Review of 'The Parasite from Proto-Space' by Brett Petersen
I knew I was going to like this when it started out with some random douchebag mumbling nonsense, whacked out on a cocktail of drugs. Specifically ketamine, fentanyl, and crack. For sure, that would likely kill the most hard core drug addict, but it sounds like a wild ride down a short rabbit hole.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Suspiria' (1977)
It's like a right of god damn passage for a horror critic to review this movie, and since the remake, I knew at some point I'd have to bite the bullet and get it over with. I'd seen it a long damn time ago and remembered it fondly. Though, I never did understand how Suspiria became a critics choice for seriously every fucking critic in the horror industry. Don't get me wrong, its good. Damn good. And for 1977, WAY the fuck ahead of it's time.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Sample: Artifice of Flesh, by John Baltisberger and Reed Alexander (2020)
Follow the case files of the Unnatural Perpetrators Department, division of the FBI. The UPD is a special task force charge with hunting down and stopping serial killers of 'unnatural origins.'
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexanders's Horror Review of 'Underwater' (2020)
I was super worried I've have to apologizes to Kristen Stewart for all of the jokes I've made about her acting career. I've compared a lot of the worst acting in horror to Ms. Stewart and I never exactly let up on her for her involvement in Twilight. I'm low key kinda glad this movie wasn't as good as it looked in the previews, because now I don't have to apologize.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Death House' (2017)
45 minutes. 45 FUCKING MINUTES of god damn setup. How the FUCK do you waste 45 FUCKING MINUTES of a god damn horror movie on the fucking fluff?!? Nobody fucking came here for a god damn story! We came here to see a parade of horror legends get their murder on! You don't fucking need 45 minutes of setup to deliver a god damn parade of horror legends! Introduce the concept, start the prison riot, and let the mayhem begin! That's 10 fucking minutes TOPS!
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Geeks
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Configuration Discordant' by John Baltisberger (2020)
I don’t normally do poetry. Like your typical ‘cain wagger,’ I don’t get it, and I’m not sure I even want it. If you’re going to ryme or rap, fucking throw a beat behind it.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Changeling' (1980)
I honestly can't understand why this movie didn't get just as much recognition as The Exorcist (X1). It wasn't as graphic or controversial as X1 so perhaps that's why it didn't get the notoriety? The thing is, The Changeling is every bit as good. It's got a fantastic cast, with our old friend George C. Scott, and even the venerable Melvin Douglas. So the acting solid and matched by a great character driven plot with solid dialog. The over arcing premises of the plot is clever, and it was the first of it's kind at that time. The story was brilliantly plotted, tho a bit poorly paced. And while there are a few questions sort of just left to interpretation, the plot is strongly devoid of holes.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Devil's Rejects' (2005)
Rob lost the fucking plot. Plain and simple. House of 1000 Corpses (HO1kC) was a rare and special moment, and this sequel just didn't know what to do with its damn self. It's like Rob forgot who the characters were. Baby Firefly from the first movie was a deranged infantile psycho. This movie has her as a boring bully. Yeah she still has the childish lean, but it's almost too mature from the daffy character I loved from HO1kC. Otis Driftwood was a god damn artist (at least in his own mind). This movie paints him as a mindless brute, a simple thug with a level of ruthless efficiency. Hell, he gets rapey. He wasn't rapey in the first movie. Maybe a bit perverted, but not rapey. Captain Spaulding was the only one who got his fucking character right.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Devil Inside' (2012)
I really think it's important for my fans to read my review of The Taking of Deborah Logan (TTODL) first to understand why this movie is so much better, regardless of the fact that TTODL had a better plot and even better actors. Check out that review at the link below.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Little Monsters' (2019)
Swinging in to dethrone Shaun of the Dead for my all time #1 horror comedy is Lupita Nyong'o with Little Monsters! The closest thing I can compare this avant garde, absurdist comedy to is Death to Smootchy (2002). I don't review non horror comedy, but if I ever did, it would be Death to Smootchy, which is easily my #1 all time comedy.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Dreamscape' (1984)
Dreamscape was the k-mart A Nightmare on Elm Street (ANOES) that was rushed to the theaters a couple moth before. So TECHNICALLY it predates ANOES, but in the same way Leviathan predates The Abyss. Back in the days, little studios would catch wind of what the big boys were doing and try to head them off at the pass with quicker productions and cheaper budgeting.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Event Horizon' (1997)
I've always wondered to myself why Event Horizon isn't higher on my list of top 10 horror movies. It's not that I don't firmly stand by my current position for it at #6. It's just that I never considered why it wasn't better as I haven't bothered to go back since I started reviewing movies. So, by this day, November the 13th, year of our lord 2019, eight years after having started my career as a movie critic, I returned to one of my all time favorite movies to give it a closer look.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
