Reed Alexander
Bio
I'm a horror author and foulmouthed critic of all things horror. New reviews posted every Sunday.
@ReedsHorror on TikTok, Blue Sky, Instagram, YouTube, and Mastodon.
Check out my books at reedshorror.com
Stories (317)
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Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Notebook (2004)
Anybody else get a rapey vibe off of Noah at the beginning of this movie? He just walks up to a complete stranger, who is with her boyfriend, and in a low and vaguely threatening tone is all like "I wanna dance with you." I swear you can hear fucking banjo after that. His next words should be, "I wanna hear you squeal like a piggy." The fact that this girl's friend gets misty over it says she ain't that much of a friend. More like the kind of friend who you'd ask to watch your drink, but would immediately hands it to the seediest guy at the bar.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Humans
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Zombie With A Shotgun' (2019)
Yeah, this was fun. As many of my readers well know, my wife watches a lot of horror movies with me, and one of our favorite things to do is riff the movie we're watching. It's one of the ways I know a movie has riffing potential. Of course this movie, being a shoe-string indie, had all kinds of riffable material. It's like the trope my wife coined "ForeCaging," (named after the hammy acting of Nicolas Cage) which means "Foreshadowing riff worthy material from the setup."
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Welcome to the Horror Show.'
I had long considered the use of Vinettes for horror after I was invited to review 15 Second Horror Movies on YouTube. For the most part they were pretty entertaining, so when I was asked to review another series of Vinettes (now called Toks as Vine has long since shut down to be replace by Tik Tok), I jumped on the chance.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Endless' (2017)
I ended up watching this because a friend recommended it after I surprisingly enjoyed Color Out Of Space (2019). The 2010's brought us a huge uptick in seriously quality Lovecraftian horror, many of which made it on to my 'All Time Top Horror' list.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of C.H.U.D. (1984)
This movie is pretty bad, but for what it is, it's actually quite good. And I don't mean 'so bad it's good,' I mean actually good. And I'm not grading on a curve here. Don't misunderstand me, there is so much about this movie that is jut flat out bad that it should fit into the category of good-bad movies. In fact, I struggle to place it anywhere else. It's a bit of a paradox, a movie being both good and bad while not technically being good-bad.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Literary Review of 'Just Break My Heart Already' (2020) by Chaire Michael Clemons
You know what was brilliant about the opening of this book? I feel like it needed a trigger warning. The narrator is so good at emulating that little voice of anxiety in my head; and if you don't have anxiety LIKE FUCKING ME, after this, you might. It's an excellent way to really set you off, and in this respect, set the mood.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Poets
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Color Out of Space' (2019)
Back in my review of Mandy, (2018) I complained that I didn't get the ultimate Nick Cage experience I was promised. I was told it would be full force, category 5, Nicolas Cage. I was expecting Cage to deliver the ham of godly proportions. The reason this was so important to me, is that it was litmus test for this movie, Color Out of Space (2019).
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Polaroid' (2019)
It's weird that I ended up watching this movie right after the remake of A Nightmare on Elm Street (Elm Str). They have a lot of odd similarities. I think the person who wrote this movie, might have been trying to come up with a new adaption on the Elm Str. concept, and just phoned it in. I mean, a child murderer, with supernatural powers, uses them within a very strict mythos, to murder the children of the people who killed him.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'A Nightmare on Elm Street" (2010)
There was nothing really wrong with this remake. Actually, it was pretty damn good. Sure, there was tons of unnecessary CGI, yeah it wasn't Robert Englund's Freddy Krueger, YES the original A Nightmare on Elm Street 1984 (Elm Street) was better, but this was good, damn good.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Bubba Ho-Tep' (2002)
If it wasn't for the internet, this would've become just another cult classic... I guess that sorta means it still is a cult classic, but this movie could have faded into obscurity if it was released only a couple years earlier in the late 90s. Meaning, they kinda lucked out riding the crest of the internet age. Right at the start of it all, a time when you could still go viral but right before going viral had lost all meaning.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Crazies' (2010)
This just wasn't as much fun as the original. Now, I'm not saying the original was good, I actually thought it was kind of boring considering the concept they had to work with. The difference between the original and the remake can be spelled out by tone and pacing. So far as tone goes, the original mixed a level of absurdity with the violence. Yeah there were rampaging lunatics, but some of them were fun rampaging lunatics. It gave you the idea that the virus might cause you to be violent, but in random and even wacky ways. We're not talking comedy levels here, just enough to note the difference.
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Suspiria' (2018)
My fucking god... where do I even begin? What an absolutely stunning movie. Everything from the dance choreography to the setting, to the story. There was only a solitary moment that was out of place and I'm really pulling hairs to be critical of even that!
By Reed Alexander6 years ago in Horror
