Natasha Ward
Stories (2)
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Why did you leave me?
I don’t know where to start. It seems like it was just yesterday when I told him that I loved him. I mean we’ve known each other for years. We grew up in church together and he was my first boyfriend. Years went by and we lost contact With each other but the way I felt never changed. Every since that day I don’t think I looked at life the same. I remember it like it was yesterday when I got word that you were dead. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing or what I was seeing on the news. It said it was a home invasion or a robbery gone bad at the front door and that bastard took your life. He took my first love my first boyfriend my heart. I literally cried for a week straight my eyes were puffy they were red and I Still couldn’t believe what happened. I feel so bad for your mother and your father and your kids I couldn’t even imagine what they were feeling and I didn’t know how they were going to get through this. And to think about it your brothers, one brother was in jail do you have a brother lives out in the streets on drugs I just didn’t know how they would take it. Not a day goes by that I don’t think about you that’s how much you implanted in my heart. I mean who could ever forget their first love? There are days that I wish I could change what happened there are days I wish I could go back in time so when we were getting older and stay more in contact with you. But I can’t change that. I still cry for you my heart still breaks and I try every day to live life to the fullest knowing that every day is not promised your life could be taken at any time. And I have to keep reminding myself that you have to live life and not only fair me before my kids I don’t wanna wake up one morning and either my kids are gone or they wake up one morning and I’m gone. Sometimes I have dreams about you and us having a family together but I got to keep moving forward and live daily as if you were here. I love you to the moon and back. I know if I could visit heaven I would come visit you. I would come and talk to you about I was growing up and what we did at the time that we were separated. I will also talk about your children and how much they’ve grown. I think the last time I saw you was when your son got baptized at church. You were so happy because you saying that he was trying to take that step to live a better life especially at a young age and I know for a fact that you love your kids and they love you. Your mother and your father misses you I know your brothers miss you. hy did you have to leave me behind? You were my first love and will always be in my heart. We were always together no matter where we went when we were in church. You drifted away from church as you got older, but when you showed up to church I would be overjoyed and excited to see you. The day I found out that you were killed my heart broke into a million pieces. Although we never made it to the relationship status, I still hold you in my heart. Lord knows I wish I could rewind time I would. I miss you dearly and love you more. Until we meet again, this is goodbye.
By Natasha Ward5 years ago in Humans
Why I fell in love
When it comes to me and love, I feel that there is no one out there that loves me more than him. It was the year 2016 and I had just broken up with my boyfriend who I had only been dating for a few months. Honest to say he wasn't the one for me. I began searching online for someone to talk to and maybe build with if we got along. So I met this guy on POF (Plenty of Fish) and we hit it off. We would talk everyday, all day and all night as if we had known each other for years. From beginning to end, nothing was forced everything was free. We talked about everything from past relationships, finances, family, he even allowed me to cry on his shoulders a month after we met. Nothing felt strange with him.We finally made it official in September of that year and I was at my happiest. Every morning I would wake up and he'd send me good morning messages, and I loved every bit of it. Although people say it's not safe to online date and you can't find love, I believe that they are sometimes wrong. Don’t get me started on how hot the attraction was between us. Like no matter how far apart we were it was like I could feel him as if we were laying next to each other. The words he would say to me would replay in my head and made an imprint on my heart. We dated for a year before things started to go down hill for us. He suffered from PTSD and with everything going on in his life it started to take a tole on him. We went our separate ways and didn't say good bye or anything. It broke my heart that the man I was falling in love with just disappeared. Two years went by and I was back with my ex at this point. Not only was I back with him I was also pregnant with my son. Out of the blue, he messaged me saying he was sorry and missed me and wanted to be with me. I met up with him, it broke his heart that I was back with my ex and we were now having a son together. We met at my house to talk about it and couldn't come to an agreement so after some time we finally decided to part ways. Not a day went by that I didn't think of him. It wasn't until June of this year 2020 that we got reconnected again. We’ve dreamed and talked about having kids together one day in the future. For me, I didn’t feel like it would happen. I didn’t feel like we would even end up together and make this work. I felt that after us separating and having no communication that we would fall out of love. “Good morning my sexy & gorgeous love😊💛 I pray that God continues to bless you and guide you as he does the same for me! I know you’re going to have a an amazing day for your smile can light up the room😁💖 As the first rays of the sun touch your face, you glow like an angel straight from heaven. I pray that God watches over you and heals you from any pain you may be going through. Have a blessed and prosperous day🥰🖤🌺😇😘🥰.” Words of encouragement, life and love flows from your heart and to your fingertips. He expresses his love for me daily. He has shown me how I should be loved and treated as a queen and he as a king. I don’t think I would ever find another love like him. He’s perfect! His love runs through my veins and his love for me is why I fell in love with him! Someone asked me, “ how does it feel to have something so special with someone? The fact that you connected, disconnected and then reconnected again.” I told them, “ when it’s meant to be it will be.” I wouldn’t have it any other way than to have a life with him.
By Natasha Ward5 years ago in Humans
