Josephine Oche
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The Dangers of living a passive life
My struggle with being a peace maker Today being a holiday and a rest day off work. I looked forward to an exciting and relaxing atmosphere around me and my feelings. Somehow I rather woke up feeling burdened emotionally. I kept wondering what it was that made me feel so choked with such emotions. I looked around to see how much of financial and physical responsibilities I have had to carry on my shoulders lately but I didn't see enough that called for such mood. Then I tried to do some reflections inwardly. I worked my thoughts though my family, friends and work relationships. Meanwhile I get to do this occasionally and on need basis as a way of decluttering my mind. Through my thoughts I tried to focus on what was not working or what didn't feel too good about my relationships. Not too far in to my thoughts, I quickly remembered an encounter in my work place with a good friend. While working together on a project, we had a mix up with the details and entitlements of another colleague who I felt had a better rapport with my friend and so I asked my friend nicely for a help to relate the issue to this colleague in question. I was surprised at the reaction I got. I was not only suprised but embarrassed at my friend's reaction because other people who knew how close I was to my friend, were around watching and listening. Initially my little ego played a fast one on me as I got irritated and responded vocally the same way mainly because somewhere in my heart I felt my friend was even responsible for the error in the first place and she was aware so I wondered why the drama. Then again I couldn't bear the troublesome scene and the eyes watching, I couldn't stand the public show of disagreement between my friend and I. I quickly held back from expressing further how wrong and inappropriate her reaction was and called the colleague right there to explain the error, how we planned to fix it and that was it, I never said a word about it again and moved on. I have had several experiences where I just sly under people's opinion or expression, decisions or views just to avoid objections, disaggrements or arguments. Alot of times i give up my opinions or views which may be right and that sadly makes me to always do what others expect of me, whether good or bad for me. In my moving past most of those experiences, I would in a split of time feel that i had dealt with them emotionally. But today as i reflected through my personality I realized that my being so much of a peace maker even when i needed to openly address certain issues had made me to embrace and take in just about anything from people I relate with every day. Someone rightly said and I quote that the way we communicate with ourselves and others ultimately determines the quality of our lives. I will quickly share the dangers of living a passive life from my experience so far,
By Josephine Oche5 years ago in Motivation
The gains of pain
I lived over 37 years of my life in ignorance. Ignorance of the life I was living, ignorance of who I am and what I even look like physically. I lived because I had a breath. Unaware of my being, my wants and desires, the world sadly even my immediate environment. My family and my people I knew growing up miragely filled my space. I kept going in life not really knowing why I was going or what values I should have. I grew up in a home filled with people but had barely anyone who would show me or talk me into seeing the beauty of life. This made me grow up into a superficial being. Even though I desired deep and real relationships I never really opened myself to any. I existed in my world unaware of the big world and my part in it. My emotions where tucked in so deep that i couldn't really reach out to anyone but me. So if I had to deal with any emotion whether negative or positive, I dealt with any way I could and all by myself
By Josephine Oche5 years ago in Motivation
