Gemma Parker
Bio
Psychologist interested in all things human, particularly connectedness, intimacy, healthy relationships and love. Musician, student, creative soul, incessant need for joy, mischief and justice.
www.altogetherhuman.org.uk
@craftipsych
Stories (9)
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3 books that will change your relationships
In my work with couples and families, I am often asked about reading material that would supplement or sometimes replace therapeutic work around relationships. There is a lot that can change through reading, reflecting and taking action and it’s far cheaper than most therapies around.
By Gemma Parker4 years ago in Humans
How's your relationship with change?
I was in conversation with a good friend, Jolene, from Joy Ethic recently when she asked me whether I would talk to her about change for a podcast. For a moment, I was thrown. “What do I know about change?” I said. She laughed kindly and told me I talked to people about change all the time. She asked me if I could say a bit about the kinds of changes that people talk to me about, and what we can do to adjust or adapt to change.
By Gemma Parker4 years ago in Humans
Reducing unhealthy conflict
I talk with people about conflict a lot. Often, couples come to speak to me about their cycle of conflict, or negative cycle, because the way that they are in conflict is causing problems in their lives. Sometimes family members come for similar reasons. I find that people often want to banish conflict from their lives entirely, but the avoidance of conflict causes difficulties too — mostly a lack of connection and understanding and this is a huge sacrifice to make for a peaceful life. So I talk to people about the difference between healthy conflict and unhealthy conflict, or ways that people can disagree without getting into arguments. Healthy conflict causes the energy that we need for change. Put another way, you can’t polish a gem without a little friction!
By Gemma Parker4 years ago in Humans
The beginning
Before this beginning, there was an end. I guess that’s the way for most things; stories wax and wane, stop and start, fade and are reborn. For me, the end of the previous story was my stepping away from the NHS and my role there as a clinical psychologist. That was a whole different story that I’m not sure I’ll ever share in full. But the next part, the way out of the fog, the personal rebuilding, renovating, restoring took the form of creating something new, something energising, collaborative and connected. Along with a couple of trusted and much loved colleagues, I set up a social enterprise to allow us to work with people in the community who wanted to have healthier, happier, more connected relationships with others.
By Gemma Parker4 years ago in Humans
Alternative resignation letter
Dear NHS, I'm writing this in case you notice that I've gone. You're so busy and overwhelmed that you might not notice for a while. But maybe when the next person leaves you or the next one, you might end up wondering whether it's you, whether it's something you did or you didn't do that means that people who were once committed to you, once loved you and cared for you and worked so hard to sustain you just upped and left.
By Gemma Parker4 years ago in Humans
Hello??
I was woken at 1am, by my partner, B, coming to bed, expressing his disbelief that I had managed to fall asleep despite the neighbours being so noisy. In my half-sleep, I wondered whether this was irony. I’d always struggled with the concept. I came to slowly, increasingly aware of the fact that the bed was vibrating rhythmically, a girl was shrieking and I could smell skunk. Someone was having a party. B declared that he was putting his ear plugs in and got into bed.
By Gemma Parker4 years ago in Humans
Two pairs of legs
It was just a quick trip to Aldi for a sandwich on my way to work. I noticed two pairs of legs protruding from a dirty orange blanket on the floor as I approached. It's a cold night to have slept outside, I thought to myself. Staff members from Aldi and the neighbouring newsagents exchanged silent glances as I passed. There was more to this story.
By Gemma Parker4 years ago in Humans
