Everyday Junglist
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About me. You know how everyone says to be a successful writer you should focus in one or two areas. I continue to prove them correct.
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Gillette Scientists Announce Breakthrough in Decades Long Quest to Develop Planck’s Razor
Prototype Expected By Year’s End Gillette scientists announced a major breakthrough today in their decades long quest to develop the so called Planck’s razor. The until now only theoretical razor would give a man the closest shave possible in the universe based on our current understanding of the physical laws which underlie it. The beard hair would be cut at the smallest possible measurable unit of distance (Planck’s length) from the face resulting in a face actually smoother than a baby’s bottom. In fact, if the models describing the razor are accurate, the Planck’s razor shaved face would be 10²² times smoother than a baby’s bottom which actually has microhairs at the molecular level which can be sensed by human touch. Human senses are nowhere near sensitive enough to detect any facial hair on the Planck’s razor shaved face, and it is said such a face would feel like glass or silk to the touch. The scientists noted that any man who had such a silky smooth face would be a hit with the ladies since everyone knows “they go crazy for a cleanly shaven man.” The breakthrough is said to have come when Gillette researchers discovered how to create a near infinite repeating layer of attomolecular razors (1 attometer = 1 x 10^-18 meters). The layers of tiny razors are separated by flexible carbon nanotubes that act as molecular springs allowing each attolayer to “float” just above the layer below it, and just above the lowest level of skin molecules at the surface of the face. If not for these springs the razors sharpness would immediately slice to ribbons any face which it even glanced upon. Concerns about safety, and the bloodshed that could occur should the nanosprings fail, have kept Gillette scientists from constructing a prototype. However, that prohibition may soon end and we may yet see Planck’s razors for sale in local supermarkets within the year. Gillette expects them to retail for $8,000 per pack of six blades or $10,000 for eight. The high price will be a barrier for many but considering each blade is expected to last well beyond 300 years before dulling it may be worth the investment over the lifetime of the average hairy faced man.
By Everyday Junglist4 years ago in Lifehack
Last Remaining Transhumanist Swears the Singularity is Still Gonna Happen
The worlds last remaining transhumanist reported today that the singularity is still just around the corner and will be here before you know it. Ted Stephens, speaking from his parents basement, made the following statement describing his belief in no uncertain terms. “People called us crazy five years ago when we began sharing the news that the singularity was coming with the non woke people of the world. They said a utopian future fueled by runaway computer growth featuring ultra intelligent machines catering to our every wish, allowing us to live in work free luxury while they do all the work of maintaining our world and civilization, was nuts. That saying man and machine would bond to form a new third species that transcends the limitations of both, sounded like the ramblings of a madman. Well, who’s crazy now, I ask them, who’s crazy now? The singularity is coming. This week for sure, or next, possibly next month, likely this year, almost certainly in the next five years, no doubt about it this decade, can’t miss absolutely certain this century, you’ll see, you’ll all see.” He then cackled strangely, turned, and slowly walked away. Reached for comment the rest of the world replied “the singu what now? Was that the thing where all the drones were going to be delivering our packages and filling the skies in a cloud so thick it blocks out the sun? or the thing with the cars that drive themselves? and aren’t computers already ultra-intelligent, I mean machines are learning left and right out there and they have beaten us at a bunch of games, including some humans consider very hard. A non intelligent computer could never do that. That dude is a weirdo.”
By Everyday Junglist4 years ago in Futurism
The Time I Almost Died in Real Life and Did Die In My Mind
Authors note: These events are relayed to the best of my recollection. Obviously, given the situation, that recollection is far from perfect. I have written so much about this event/these things but never put any of it out for public consumption before. Maybe it was too painful or too personal or too scary. Whatever the reasons I’m over them. I will be updating/editing and releasing parts of some of these writings from now until I run out I guess. I hope they can mean something to someone besides me.
By Everyday Junglist4 years ago in Humans
My Cat Shima
Author's note: The below story was originally published in November 2016. Since that time my life has taken many strange and exciting twists and I have become the guardian of many, many more cats. I have even lost some as well. Only perhaps one has touched me as much as Shima did. I still miss her dearly.
By Everyday Junglist4 years ago in Petlife
My Wife and I Are Both Fighting SARS-CoV-2 in the Lab
Author's note: The story below was first published on a different platform in May 2020. Many of the fears I expressed in the article have thankfully not come to pass. Specifically ADE (at least of the classical variety) has not proven to be an issue. I still have significant concerns about the medium to long term safety profile of the mRNA vaccines, though obviously not enough to stop me from getting thrice vaccinated with them. The article took a fairly pessimistic tone which I still feel is justified. In many ways I undersold the dangeers. In particular the numerousness and ferocity of the SARS-CoV-2 variants was not something I had foreseen. Overall I still thinks it makes an interesting read and gives a good picture of travel during the early days of the pandemic.
By Everyday Junglist4 years ago in Longevity
Please Don’t Call Your Jobs (Or Side Jobs) Hustles
If I may put on my grumpy old man hat for a moment we need to have a talk. I appreciate the ever evolving nature of our language as much as anyone. In fact I have written frequently about language including not one but two articles specifically on the topic of precision in language, and why it is so important. In those articles I go out of my way to note that language is not some static affair and that meanings of words do shift and change with time. I understand that the word hustle has somewhat recently come to be applied to just about anything someone does to make money. On the one hand I can appreciate the association of the word with work. It suggest an aggressive attitude, a let’s get it done quickly approach, etc. On the other hand it brings a lot of negative baggage along for the ride. First, it suggests a lack of seriousness about whatever endeavor it is being applied to describe. A hustle is more like a hobby that makes money then a job. Thus, like a hobby, one’s dedication to it might change in intensity over time. It is transient or temporary. As an example, just like collecting baseball cards used to be your passionate hobby, writing is your hobby now, but who knows what it might be next week? Why would I want to pay someone money if that is the attitude they take toward the job I am paying them to do? Even if writing really is a hobby for you, and you don’t really take it all that seriously, yet you have the temerity to expect people to pay you for it, why rub it in their face? A great question I surely would have no idea about.
By Everyday Junglist4 years ago in Journal
What if My AI is Manic Depressive
My AI Build Project Gets Me Worried In addition to a lot of the stuff I have been working on as I continue my at home AI build I have been doing a lot of worrying. The number of things that could go horribly wrong seem to be staggeringly high and there is no historical data on which to judge the probabilities of such things happening, nor are there even any really solid theoretical underpinnings on which to hang my hat so to speak. As I worked through my list of concerns in my mind I started to feel a bit depressed. As I started to feel depressed I started to think about another interesting and potentially terrifying possibility for my AI, What if it is “born” or later becomes “mentally” ill?
By Everyday Junglist4 years ago in Futurism
The Smallest Kindness Redeems
It had been a long day already. A drive that Google maps had said would take six hours in total was already at hour six and we were barely half way to our destination. We had left the geothermal pools of the calcium carbonate mountain Pamukkale in Turkey that morning and I was very irritated. The afternoon before we had a fairly disturbing hotel experience which was scary enough to cause us to leave the hotel immediately after check in and to not return for checkout. The place we found as a replacement was only slightly better and I felt discriminated against and uneasy there as well. Overall the past day and a half had been full of mini-frustrations, mostly due to my own ignorance of the Turkish language. A lack of quality sleep was aggravating the situation badly. I was in a foul mood and was lashing out at even the smallest of perceived injustices. In truth nothing bad had happened, we were never in even the slightest of jeopardy, and nobody had said or done anything of real significance in any way negative to us since we had entered the country two days prior. However, to me it felt as if the whole country was against me. I was being targeted as an American and treated poorly as a result.
By Everyday Junglist4 years ago in Wander
Would an AI Have Any Interest in Using VR?
A while ago I posted a stupid ‘humor’ piece recently in which I tried to illustrate some of the similarities and differences between artificial intelligence and virtual reality (note: normally I would provide a link to said stupid piece but since it is <600 words I cannot publish it on Vocal and as my account with Medium remains suspended I cannot link to it there.) As I neared the end of the post I started wondering what an AI would actually make of virtual reality. Specifically what an embodied artificial intelligence with sensory apparatus of some kind would think about virtual reality and its potential usefulness to itself. Incidentally, an embodied AI with one or more sensory modalities is the only format I believe possible for one to achieve actual human level ‘intelligence’. Whether or not that position is correct it is still interesting to consider what might happen if an embodied AI ever were ‘created/born/made’, after it was exposed to the idea of virtual reality.
By Everyday Junglist4 years ago in Futurism
