Courtney Keller
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Its Inside Again. Content Warning. AI-Generated.
“I am so glad we went out,” Sarah yelled at her friend over the noise of arcade dings and teenagers screaming. “Me too,” her friend stated as she kept her gaze on the screen. The games villians and heros flickering in her eyes.
By Courtney Keller9 months ago in Confessions
It is Inside Again/Take It From Me. Content Warning. AI-Generated.
These two poems are kinda the same, but also not. They show different sides of what I’ve been feeling lately. There’s this darkness that doesn’t go away—it just hangs around, even when I’m trying to be happy. I can laugh, I can smile, but that heavy feeling doesn’t leave. It’s always there, in the background.
By Courtney Keller9 months ago in Confessions
Escaping Elise. Content Warning. AI-Generated.
Part 1: The Cold and the Cage Elise tugged her coat tighter around her small frame as she hurried home in the biting cold. The bruises on her wrist throbbed, a painful reminder of her boyfriend Brian’s explosive temper. She couldn’t even remember what had set him off this time—maybe a wrong look, maybe her tone. It didn’t matter. It never did. Her long blonde hair now chopped, and her green eyes darted around nervously. Elise had always been slender, but the weight she had lost from constant stress made her appear frail. She looked haunted, like a ghost of her former self. Brian, on the other hand, was broad-shouldered and intimidating. His short, dark hair was always neatly trimmed, and his blue eyes that once seemed charming now only held anger. He towered over her, using his presence as much as his words to control her. After coming home late from her dance lesson, Elise found Brian in bed with another woman. This woman was blonde, her hair cut short. Her body was thick and full. She was everything Elise was not. Heartbroken, Elise began to back away. She needed to leave. However Brian wouldn't let her. As Elise stood in the doorway, staring at the two tangled in bed, Brian yelled at her. "You are late. Is this what you want from me? I am a man! I have needs." "Needs?" Elise whispered. "The only thing you need, is a therapist. You egotistic narcissistic a**." Elise gasped. It was the first time She ever stood up to Brian. She knew she was going to regret it. "Excuse me." Brian jumped up, running towards Elise. Anger filled his eyes, an Anger all to familiar. Pinching her chin with his hand, he held her face steady. Tears started streaming down her face, as the the woman in bed just laughed. "I am sorry," Elise cried for forgiveness. She knew not to make him made. One mistake… Brian laughed, as he lowered his head towards her neck nibbling gently. "I'll forgive you this time, and to show you how kind I am tonight. I'll help you." Pulling out a pocketknife from the side table, Brian started chopping off Elise's long blond hair. “You know, I might actually find you more attractive if you didn’t look like this. So, bland. Nothing fun. So boring.” He said as he chopped off clumps of her hair. As more tears streamed down her face, The mysterious blonde stood up. "Oh, now, she looks just like me. I want to be prettier." Elise turned her eyes towards her, how could that woman be so cruel to another. She sees what is happened, but doesn't choose to help? "It's okay baby, I'll fix that, No one will ever look as good as you." Brian pulled Elise's face to look back at him. That's when the blows came one by one. First Brian, then the woman. Elise, small and fragile, could do nothing but fall as they kicked and beraded her. Elise was hurt and embarrassed. Usually in fights like this, Brian would remove everything she had. A sign to show she had nothing without him. She hoped and prayed that he would save her the embarrassment and pain this time. The only thing worse than this would be her death, or would it be a relief? Once the beatings stopped, Brian and the mysterious woman left them room. However, Elise could still hear their laughs in taunts in the distance. They locked her in here. As Elise layed on the floor bloody and brused, tears streamed down her face. How did she get here? She use to have a loving husband. One who adored her. Never laying a finger on her. Now. He was a monster. Elise started to feel drops of water gently sting her skin. Looking up, Elise saw the unlocked window opened. Wind lightly brushed the air. As water droplets started to lightly fall from the sky. Now was her chance. Pressing against the floor, she struggled to push herself up. Only making it on her hands and knees. Crawling over to the window, she gripped the curtains. Carefully pulling herself up without making sound. Throwing her body out the window, she landed on a soft bush. "Hel..," she went to scream, but stopped herself. What if Brian heard? She was alone, cold, and bruised. As the rain lightly hit her skin, it comforted her in a strange way. Using what little strength she had, Elise forced herself to run. Once Elise arrived at the bus stop, reality hit her. She actually was alone. She had no where to go. No phone, no money, and no hope. She was trapped with him, and she had to go back. That night, Elise never made it home. Elise stumbled down the sidewalk, her breath shaky and uneven as she fought to keep her composure. The night air cut through her thin coat, but the chill was nothing compared to the numbness spreading through her chest. Her face was raw from tears, her eyes red and swollen, and her wrists ached from where her husband, Brian, had grabbed her in one of his rages. The bruises on her arms and were just beginning to turn purple, a fresh reminder of the explosion of violence she had just endured. She wasn’t sure where she was going. She never was. Every time she tried to leave, something always pulled her back. Brian’s words, his threats, his lies—they kept her tethered to him, even when her heart screamed for escape. The weight of it all pressed down on her, making it hard to breathe. But she couldn’t go back. Not tonight. Not after what he’d done. As she walked through the nearly deserted streets, the harshness of the cold on her skin felt almost like a relief, like it could freeze the pain away. Her feet began to bleed, and she couldn’t hold back a sob as her body trembled with the aftermath of the beating. She hated herself for crying, for showing weakness. But she couldn’t stop it. Not this time. In her dazed state, she didn’t notice the man following her until it was too late. A strong hand gripped her shoulder, jerking her around. Elise gasped, a sharp cry escaping her lips as she tried to back away, but her legs wobbled from the shock and pain. It didn’t help that her bare feet were already bruised and bloody from the miles she ran. “Hey,” a low voice called, calm and steady. She looked up, startled. The man was tall and lean, with auburn hair that fell to his shoulders, and grey eyes that seemed to be studying her every move. He was dressed in a worn leather jacket, looking almost out of place in the quiet night. But, it was no stranger than Elise. Running from her husband, with no time to change. She stood below him in a black dress covered with small traces of blood. Her blonde hair was tangled and matted. The only thing normal tonight, was her crystal blue eyes. His gaze flickered over her, noticing the bruises on her arms, the tear tracks on her face, but he didn’t say anything about them. His lips curled into a faint smirk as he watched her, but it wasn’t cruel—just distant, as if he had seen enough to not be surprised by her appearance. “Everything okay?” he asked, his voice carrying a hint of curiosity. Elise couldn’t find her voice, her head spinning from the combination of fear, exhaustion, and overwhelming relief. Would this man save her? Maybe she could get out of here, away from Brian. She couldn’t go back to him. Not again. But she couldn’t speak—she couldn’t explain anything. She just shook her head and took a step back. The man took a step forward, his grip tightening on her shoulder. “I would not do that if I were you.” Before Elise could react, a sharp pain shot through her chest as her breathing started to slow. Her heart skipped a beat. She felt the darkness pulling her under. but before she could fall completely, the world around her spun and went black. Part 2: Fear and Resignation When Elise’s eyes fluttered open, her body jolted with panic. Her breath came in rapid, shallow gasps as she realized she was no longer on the street. Her hands were bound tightly to the cold metal chair, her legs shackled. She blinked, struggling to focus on her surroundings. The room was dimly lit, with peeling walls and a strong lavender odor clung to the air. A man sat across from her, his eyes locked on her with unnerving intensity. His face was rough, the lines of a hard life carved into his features. His dark, untamed hair fell to his shoulders in messy waves, and his grey eyes gleamed with a combination of amusement, confusion, and guilt. “Morning, Sleeping Beauty,” he drawled, his voice raspy and low. He toyed with a large, gleaming knife, running his fingers along the blade with casual ease. Elise swallowed, her voice trembling. “What… What do you want? Who are you?” He chuckled softly, his eyes never leaving hers. “What do I want? You. Elise, I want you.” Her heart thudded painfully in her chest. “Please… don’t hurt me.” The man tilted his head, studying her with a mixture of curiosity and disdain. “You’re already terrified. I am not going to hurt you.. You are begging me to not hurt you. Yet, someone already did.” She looked down, somehow embarrassed by his words. He stood slowly, towering over her as he walked toward her. “Relax. I’m not going to kill you. I am not a bad person.” “You kidnapped me,” she sighed, “Rapist, Abusers, and kidnappers are like the THREE main bad people.” “I am not a rapist,” the man became angry. Elise jumped in her chair has her eyes trailed the knife in his hands. “What do you want,” she began to panic. “As I stated before, you.” “Me, look at me?,” Elise scoffed. The man stood up, walking to her slowly. Elise couldn’t help, but watch his muscles shift as he made even the slightest movements. Grabbing the handles of her chair, he spun Elise around facing her towards a large mirror. He mouth dropped, she began to realize what he had done. Her hair has cleaned. He cut it into a short layered Bob, fixing the uneven monstrosity from Brian. Her face was cleaned, with a new layer of mascara applied. What concerned her the most, he undressed her. She now wore a long white nightgown that had features similar to a wedding dress. “The following day, Elise’s world shifted once again. The man—who had introduced himself the night before as Lucas—came in bearing a small tray of food. It wasn’t much—just a piece of bread and a bowl of soup—gumbo maybe--but it was food. She hid her excitement over the food. Her husband would never allow her to eat so many calories in one meal. Ellie weighed 90 pounds and stood five feet tall. Her husband made sure she never gained over 100 pounds. He wanted a petite wife. One with crystal blue eyes, innocent eyes. Long blonde hair, never allowed to be cut. Hair he could use as a leash. One everyone would fawn over. The perfect fragile wife. Lucas untied her hands, watching her closely as she awkwardly fumbled with the spoon. “You’re not as talkative as I thought you would be,” Lucas remarked, his voice softer now, but still laced with a touch of mockery. Elise stared down at the soup, avoiding his gaze. “What’s the point? You’ll do what you want anyway. Just make sure to kill me at the end of it.” Lucas leaned back in his chair, his expression amused. “Resigned to your fate already?” He tilted his head, scrutinizing her. “What’s your deal, huh? I figured most people would by crying to go home by now? You, not you.” Elise’s hands clenched into fists at her sides, but she remained silent. She didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of knowing how scared she truly was. Even though life was worse on the outside, she still feared death as most do. Finally, she muttered, “Home’s not much better.” The words hung In the air, and Lucas’s gaze sharpened. “Oh? Trouble in paradise? Your husband is the CEO to Sterling Enterprise. He is a billionaires. Loads of money. You, Ellie, don’t get me started. Famous ballerina by 16 and Model by 18. You're ama…..Your life seems amazing.” She didn’t respond, but her silence spoke volumes. Lucas studied her for a long moment, before smirking. “Hmmmm, tell me something Ellie. What happened? How did you get those? A fight? “A fight?” He pointed down to her legs, still covered from her last beating. She couldn’t even remember why her husband was so mad anymore. “Like you said, trouble in paradise.” Part 4: Unlikely Bonds By the third day, something unexpected happened. Lucas, who had once seemed a sadistic captor, began to shift. His amusement had faded into a quiet restlessness. There was no longer the thrill of torment in his actions. Instead, a strange tension filled the space between them. “You know,” Lucas said jokingly, his voice distant as he twirled the knife idly in his hand, “Kidnappers don’t keep people around forever. Gets dull.” Elise’s heart raced, but instead of fear, she felt a strange sensation: relief. If Lucas was going to end her life, at least it would be a way out—an escape from the nightmare she had been living with Brian. Lucas noticed her change in demeanor. “Wait a minute,” he said, narrowing his eyes, his voice suddenly sharp. “You’re not scared. You’re… What is that? Relief? Ellie, I was kidding” Her lips trembled, and she bit them to keep the tears at bay. “Because… because anything is better than going back to him. I cannot do it anymore.” The words spilled out before she could stop them. “Him?” Lucas repeated, his voice now quieter, as though trying to understand. “My husband,” Elise whispered, her voice cracking. “He’s worse than this. He beats me. Treats me like dirt. I don’t have a choice. I have to stay with him. He takes and takes. I have no more to give. This”—she gestured around the room—“this is a vacation compared to him.” “Does he rape you?” Ellie froze, she looked at the floor. Why would Lucas ask her that? Does she lie? Tell the truth? What would happen if she answered incorrectly? What would Lucas do to her? “Does he,” this time Lucas screamed jumping up from his chair, “Answer me, now!” “YES,” Ellie began to sob, “is that what you want? To fuck me? Tell me how much you love beating me as you hold me down? Choke me? Tell me how I’m to weak to do anything about it?” “No,” Lucas walked up to her. Grabbing her chin to force her to look at him. For the first time, something flickered across Lucas’s face. It was something else entirely—compassion, perhaps. “No Ellie,” he muttered, running a hand through his messy hair. “I am not a rapist. I don’t know why I do the things I do. I am a bad person. I brought you here against your will. But, I will NEVER force myself upon another living soul. Ever.” Lucas didn’t let her go, but he stopped threatening her. He stopped messing with her head. He finally started to open up to her. Allowing her to be released from the shakles. Alouth she couldnot leave. Ellie now had free range of his “home,” They started to form a bond Instead, he began to listen. Each day, Elise found herself telling him stories she had never shared with anyone—not even her closest friends. The years of abuse, the fear, the helplessness. She talked about her childhood, her dreams, and the crushing weight of living in constant dread. “You’re messed up. Your life is messed up,” Lucas said one afternoon, his voice softer than she expected. “But it’s not your fault. You’ve been through hell.” Elise’s laugh was bitter, a harsh sound that echoed in the small room. “You’re my kidnapper, and you’re the only person who’s ever said that to me. Have you even kidnapped someone before? I don’t think this is how it goes?” Lucas scratched the back of his head, clearly unsure of how to respond. “Yeah, well, maybe I’m not so great at this whole kidnapping thing.” “You never kidnapped anyone else,” Elise stared in shock. Maybe she could finally get his motive. “No.” “You knew who I was. You knew my husband. Who are you? Why am I here?” Lucas looked at the floor scratching his head. “Elise.” “Lucas.” “I love you,” Lucas kept his gaze to the ground, “I loved you since I first met you.” “Met me…” Part 5: A Second Chance Fifteen days passed, and the strange bond between Elise and Lucas continued to grow. It was something neither of them had expected. Lucas handed Elise a bus ticket. “You’re free to go,” he said simply, as though the decision had been made long ago. Elise stared at the ticket, her mind a blur. The cold metal of the chains that had bound her—mentality and emotionally—felt lighter, but her heart still ached with confusion. She had been captive since the day she married. Her whole life had been someone else’s decision. Now, for the first time, she was faced with a choice. Why?” Her voice barely rose above a whisper. “Because you deserve a chance to fix your life,” Lucas replied. His voice was firm, but not unkind. “Just… don’t waste it.” Lucas went to hand her 500 dollars, keys, and another ticket. Stepping back from her, he stood to watch her leave. “I don’t want to go,” she said, her hands trembling as she pushed the ticket back into his hands. She couldn’t move. The weight of everything—everything she had endured—was too much. She wasn’t sure what was scarier: leaving or staying. “Ellie… Elise.” His voice wavered, caught between guilt and something else she couldn’t place. “NO.” The word tore out of her, raw and desperate. “Elise, I was wrong. I am a bad person. No better than your husband. I kidnapped you because I loved you. I saw you dance the first time, and I wanted you. But when you married him, I knew I would never have a chance. I planned to keep you here forever, make you love me. I was filled with rage that you would not love me. Jealousy, your husband had what I wanted. But then I saw what your husband did to you. What he made you endure. And I realized I’m just as sick as he is. I can’t do this anymore. I’m no better than him. Please, leave.” Elise stood frozen, staring at him. The suffocating chains that had bound her for so long seemed to loosen with each step. Her metaphorical changes, Lucas finally freed her from both her captors. She could leave. She could go. For the first time in her life, the choice was hers. Her choice…. “If I am free to go, I want to stay. Lucas, I have never felt safer. I slept here, I wasn’t watching my back for what was about to come. I was never punished for the accidents. You never hit me over the messes I have made. Lucas, I love you..I don’t want to go.” “Elise, you can’t love me. You don’t know me. Although you are safe here, you are not meant to be here. You cannot stay.” Elise ran to Lucas kissing him softly on his lips. For a moment, Lucas returned the kiss. This is what he wanted, this was his motive. He could finally have her, the love he always wanted. Pulling Lucas’ hands to her hips, he gripped her dress. Taking the hint, Lucas slowly lifted up her top exposes her breast. Lucas took a step back admiring her fragile frame. “You are beautiful.” “I love you Lucas,” Elise whispered. Pulling her back into his arms as the kissed slowly, Lucas leaned her onto the wall. Half way nudes, he began to fiddle with her panties, slowly tracing his fingers along the edge. Elise shivered, no one had made her feel like this in quiet a while. That’s what he wanted to happen, he finally had it. However, he could not do that to her. He loved her to much. She needed to be happy. Before putting his thoughts into action, Lucas stepped away. “Elise, leave now.” She didn’t speak, but as she turned toward the door, her heart hammered in her chest. She wasn’t sure what lay beyond it, but it had to be better than staying. She was finally free, and somehow, it felt like a new beginning. At the same time, it was the end. Tears started trailing down her face. She looked back for Lucas, but he was already gone. When Elise returned home. Brian was in the house being questioned again. Knocking on the door, Brian answered. the police were eager for answers. They surrounded her with questions, but she remained silent, her thoughts a blur of confusion and pain. “I don’t remember much,” she lied, her voice flat. “He let me go. That’s all.” Brian pretended to be concerned, but Elise could see through him. His words felt hollow, empty, the concern he wore like a mask failing to hide the frustration and anger in his eyes. It was as if he was angry she had returned at all. That same night, she packed her things, moving quickly, moving as quiet as possible to not wake up her sleeping husband. Once the police left, she heard all from Brian how he was the number one suspect. Instead of being relieved for her arrival. He was angry, the innocent wife…cause a scene. Making him the center of attention, ruining his business. A client he lost was a bruise she gained… This beating was different, however. Instead of sitting there, she fought back. She didn’t care anymore. The past was done, and she was walking away from it. She was done. Completely done. Brian wouldn’t hurt her anymore. Months had passed since the night Lucas freed her. Since then, Elise was staying with a friend. Hiding away from the public, the police, and interviewers. She just wanted to have Lucas back. Kara spoke, “People think you fell in love with him—that’s why you won’t report him. Have you gone to therapy? Elise, he is a bad person. Bad people need to be punished” Elise’s jaw tightened as she sat on the couch, the weight of Kara’s words settling on her like a cold stone. “You need to be honest with yourself, Elise,” Kara had said. But what was the truth anymore? Elise shook her head, her voice firm as she met her friend’s concerned gaze. “He helped me,” she said quietly. “He helped me save myself. I will forever be grateful to him. Brian was my real captor yet he walks free. Pretending to be the innocent CEO, the perfect family man, the victim. The perfect man.” Kara’s eyes widened, shock written across her face. “But this man kidnapped you. Elise, he—” “I know,” Elise interrupted, her voice steady. “He was wrong. He did terrible things. But…he never once hurt me. He never, Kara, he showed me something. He showed me I have a choice now. I wasn’t just some prisoner. I have a chance to fix my life. And that’s what I’m going to do.” Kara stood silent for a moment, processing Elise’s words. “Are you sure?” she asked gently. Elise nodded, her hands trembling slightly. “Yes. For the first time in my life, I’m not doing what someone else tells me to. I am not a pawn or a play toy. I’m choosing this. I’m choosing me. I am not scared anymore.” Elise closed her eyes, feeling the weight of everything she had survived. It was a painful journey, but it was hers to claim. As she looked ahead, the future wasn’t a terrifying unknown anymore. It was just that—the future—a blank page ready for her to write her own story. “You are not a bad person, Lucas. You just did some bad things. We all do,” Ellie thought to herself
By Courtney Keller9 months ago in Fiction
