Angela Gay
Stories (4)
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The Bad of Good Parenting
Most things in our lives have that "what to do in case shit goes sideways," saving grace protocol in some form, be it the local emergency number, personal panic alarm buttons, or even the Emergency Shut Off Button at the gas station, and most semi sentient humans are aware of these "in case of emergency or fuck up fixers" and how to properly use them. With all the new technology and fancy AI we have and use on a daily basis, there is still one aspect of life where an instruction manual, in case of emergency, or reset button is null and void, and that is being a parent. For those moments too ugly, too humiliating, and way too authentic to reveal on the next Facebook status update, there is no pause, fast forward, or big red easy button for when parenting goes sideways.
By Angela Gay4 years ago in Families
Living For Your Goodbye
As I sat my phone down, I exhaled a huge sigh of relief, though I knew it was just another habitual impermanence resulting in equivalence with every other past occurrence. I had done my weekly routine of checking the county jail for one specific new inmate, and like all your copious past incarcerations there was your mugshot, except this time, in this mugshot, your appearance was abhorrently abysmal. Your disconcerting image was now etched onto my soul, that sloven, disheveled, and atrocious physical appearance made it blatantly explicit that your self care and hygiene had become inconsequential to you and was no longer an essential priority to you. I was able to bypass your mangey, unkempt look, but I couldn't bear the all-encompassing, inevitable pain that would instantaneously invade and assailment the fibers of my emotions knowing that your safe haven in the county jail was only but a temporary habitation and yet again you'll be out. Out again and on your one goal mission to self destruct by any means that you could draw up in a syringe and inject into your veins, this always being your first and only priority. Your lack of self control, respect, and careless actions have exasperated not only myself, but your mother, of whom is not deceased and you are most likely oblivious to the fact she is gone, your father has told me to tell you to never contact him again, and I myself am saying goodbye to you as well.
By Angela Gay5 years ago in Humans
The Disease I Didn't Choose
To The Disease I Didn't Choose, "Hello, it's me, Angela, I'm sure you remember me, because I sure remember you. I remember how you came into my life, that subtle pleasure, just a double edged knife, the way you gradually intruded my thoughts and demolished my dreams, were barely the beginning of your tyrannical regimes. I see now that you were just biding your time, patiently waiting for the moment to snap my spine, to declare a last, SHE'S ALL MINE!"
By Angela Gay5 years ago in Poets
Finding Me At 33
As I stood beside my 2013 Jetta Volkswagon pumping gas with my daughter occupying the passenger seat, my son in the back andmy service dog Pretzel, I hear a lady shouting from across the store lot. " Hey Ma'am, Hey!" I realized I was the subject of her attention, a bit confused and caught off guard I made the "what's up" head motion to declare that she had my attention, and her next four words have rearranged my entire persona of me, she simply said, "I like your style!" I awkwardly smiled and yelled back a "thank you," as I finished pumping my gas, screwed in my gas cap and got in my car to drive away, those words "I like Your Style" perplexed me. I wondered was she referring to my physical appearance, of my one side shaved head and short hair parted in the middle swooped to the other side, that is now dyed blue, my numerous tattoos, the one on my throat of an octopus being started two days prior along with a septum piercing. Perhaps it was just my choice in clothing, being I was wearing rainbow colored skull leggings and a black t-shirt, or was it a combination of it all? Over the next several weeks I contemplated this enigma of what my style actually was, who I was, what made my style me, what was so intriguing about my style that it was worthy of being mine? Allow me to first introduce myself, my name is Angela, I am a 33 year old bisexual, recovering heroin addict, and single mother of two human children ages 16 and 8, and my 5 year old service dog, Pretzel, a chocolate lab and pit bull mix. I currently have tattoos covering my neck with a sugar skull dog on the right side for my daughter a wolf on the left side for my son and a fairly new start of an octopus on my throat for myself, our favorite animals, my left hand is adorned with an alien head surrounded by watercolor splashes and the symbol for Atheism on the alien's forehand, my right hand is a beautiful sugar skull lady, my arms contain the likes of a monkey, a mandala skull and diamond, the side silhouette of a nude female Japanese warrior yielding a katana, a rainbow colored Phoenix bird. Then there is the phrase "Hell Hath No Fury Like A Woman Scorned" emblazed across my upper chest, "He Was My Karma" scrawled across my left side ribcage, and a tribute piece to a deceased friend on the back of my right calf, I for sure don't have enough and will have my body illustrated by talented tattoo artists as my life adventure continues. I have my septum pierced, and a few ear piercings, my hair is shaved short on the right side and back, parted on the side with short hair swooping across to the left side and is currently colored a dark blueish purple, though this could change instantly, my hair has been nearly every color of the rainbow, with jet black being my natural color. My eyes, my best feature, are the color of cat eyes, a yellowish green and big, I have freckles speckled about the pale skin of my thick, chubby, and in my opinion fat body. I stand a whopping 5 feet tall and weigh more than what I would prefer at 140 pounds. My wardrobe is comprised mainly of leggings, most with skulls in some fashion, numerous black shirts, leopard print anything, and the same black faux quilted leather shoes. I wear makeup when the occasion is fitting and majority of the time I am wearing some long fake nails with weird or unusual art painted on them, I love being a woman and embracing the aspects that summon my inner goddess!
By Angela Gay5 years ago in Humans
