Writing Down The Bones Deck #11

This post is inspired by Denise E Lindquist. I never would have known about this deck of cards if it wasn't for her. So thank you Denise for sharing this lovely deck of cards with all of us on Vocal.

Full disclosure: I have not read Natalie Goldberg's book titled by the same name. I just own her cards.

I also receive a small commission from Amazon if you purchase these cards via the link that I have provided for you. Thank you.

I've been stuck in a writing rut. I have honestly tried everything to get myself out of the funk I have found myself in after losing my fourth child. I tried reading more- when I have time that is. I tried art journaling. I even tried listening to my favourite podcasts about writing and writers block. I mean nothing has been able to get me out of this writers block and depression I find myself in.

I was scrolling Vocal and I came across another post by Denise that featured these cards. And I thought to myself, maybe this is it. SO I bought them. I thought to myself, "Maybe this is what I need". I've been carrying the cards around for about a month- trying to get "in the mood" to write again. I started writing this on my Kindle Scribe today while I was at home and I felt everything just flow. I'm going to try and post every prompt that I work on. I truly love tarot and oracle cards as well as affirmation cards, that is why I clicked so well with these.

SO without further ado- enjoy my attempt at erasing my writer's block with the eleventh prompt.

11) You've finally eked out space to write, notebook before you, but there's nothing you feel like writing about. Don't pop up or pull a different card. Sit there for ten minutes, feeling your breath. Allow everything to be as it is. Just for now I'm asking you to be.

The back of the card suggests to write what I can accept with no judgement, no criticism after thinking and staring down at the blank page.

The day to day life is usually on my mind. The laundry that needs to be done, the kid's activities coming up, the doctors appointments, my work schedule, my partner's work schedule, does the baby have enough milk, do we need more fresh fruit- Those types of things. It's always in the back of my brain and I can't seem to turn it off and just focus on writing and what I want to write about.

People don't want to read about that kind of stuff, it's boring. Someone's average day in the life only matters if you're an influencer and I'm not. I'm just Chloe.

Nobody cares that I had spicy peanut butter ramen for breakfast today because I'm not a big breakfast eater.

I want to write about things that matter.

I want to help people.

I want to inspire others.

I want to change the world.

To be honest when I started my journey in going back to school, I wanted to become a nurse. That's specifically why I wanted to go back, I wanted to work in mental health. I wanted to take the shitty life experiences I have had and do something with them, to help others. I want to be someone my kids are proud to call their mom.

Part of me wants to edit this, gloss it up. Say something else but I think that's the beauty of this prompt. Write without judgement on yourself. These cards have been calling me out hard. But it sparked my creativity again and I'll forever be grateful for that.

I designed a challenge for myself in March, a self-care challenge. It was inspired by a person in my life whom I admire dearly. She suggested that I work on some self-care. I am hesitant to share it with others because I want to make sure that I follow through with it. I planned on writing about it actually. I'm just drowning in my own self-doubt and insecurities and I don't know how to shut that off. I need to just push through it and take a few leaps to get to where I want to be in life or I'll forever regret not even trying. I could keep it just for myself and be proud of accomplishing these goals in private but I truly want to write about it.

It's like my two half finished books. I want to publish them. I just have to stop being a perfectionist and finish what I have started. I even had my partner's sister, whom I adore, design me a piece of art for the poetry book. It's beautiful and I want to share it so badly. I can't wait until it's finished.

I'm going to make my kids proud to call me their mom one day. They are going to be proud of me.

If I could go back and redo this prompt, I would just pick a different card. I didn't like this one as much as some of the other prompt cards that I have done.

It was a good challenge though.

Thank you for reading.

Chloe Rose Violet 🌹

Part One: Writing Down The Bones Deck

Part Two: Writing Down The Bones Deck #2

Part Three: Writing Down The Bones Deck #3

Part Four: Writing Down The Bones Deck #4

Part Five: Writing Down The Bones Deck #5

Part Six: Writing Down The Bones Deck #6

Part Seven: Writing Down The Bones Deck #7

Part Eight: Writing Down The Bones Deck #8

Part Nine: Writing Down The Bones Deck #9

Part Ten: Writing Down The Bones Deck #10