Wars that started for idiotic reasons

"War, war never changes", a quote from the famous video game series Fallout. While the tactics, technologies and mentality of war has changed over centuries, the idea of it never changes. Ever since man has roamed the Earth, conflict with our own species isn't a far fetched idea. From kingdoms, countries, empires, and tribes have gone to war with one of another due to ideology, religion, resources, and/or hatred for one of another. No war is worth it unless it threatens the citizen of their countries like WWII. However, there are wars that is a exaggerated response to an event that really motivated a country to get to that point. Heck not even because its their own species but animals as well. These are some the wars I know that fit in that category.

Three Hundred and Thirty Five Years' War (Mar 30, 1651 – Apr 17, 1986)

Let's start of with something that contradicts a war. The year is 1651, in Britain there's a civil war between the Royalist and Parliamentarians. The last of the royalist resided on this island called Isles of Scilly. Then later on they declare war on the Netherlands.

Now this is the point where it goes weird, they've never been any recorded casualties nor any combat was involved. Which arguably is the World's longest war and bloodless war in history and having a peace deal in 1986. It was pretty much a forgotten, useless war that no one fought in. Although the it has been arguments on whether this declaration of war was legit or not.

The War of the Bucket (1325)

Now this is misleading title, the war wasn’t caused by someone from a city state that stole the bucket but a take over a fortress that was theirs. Here’s some context: In Italy there was a 300 year struggle between the Guelphs (supported the pope) and Ghibellines (support the Holy Roman empire). So during this period there was this conflict between the state cities of Modena (Ghibelline) and Bologna (Gueph), they knew which side they were on and fought on the Battle of Zappolino due to Modena taking over the castle of Monteveglio.

During this battle Modena brought 7,000 men and Bologna 32,000 men. Both sides lost about 2,000 men and it fell in Modena's victory and as a trophy of the battle, they took a bucket that was outside of the city wall on a well. Althought they wanted the bucket back, later in a couple of years they agreed to peace. The bucket is still there to this day in a museum in Italy. It's a common misconception about it.

Emu War ( 2 November 1932 – 10 December 1932)

Now you may be thinking "Oh a war between the Australian people vs. the Emu's, this should be the Aussie's favor". Well the Emu's actually "won" in a way to the point the Australian military gave up.

What caused the war was that these WWI veteran farmers we're complaining that a specific animal is messing with their crops and wanting government action. Since it was during the Great Depression, people couldn't trust the government at that time until one man authorized it Sir George Pierce. When the war started, the military had various issues: like their machine guns jammed constantly, the birds ran fast and can somehow dodge bullets, and the birds somehow have a "military command" by having a look out for any potential threats. The Australians had to set up ambushes but neither that didn't work. Then they had one idea, put a machine gun on a truck. At first it worked out being a mobile killing machine, but it was very unstable and caused a lot of jamming, but at least it was a good attempt at it.

Then the military stopped its operations on the birds, causing an end to the war. Later on they decided to make do animal bounties for at least 6 month period ,over 57,034 bounties have been claimed. Then someone made a pest fence barrier and it worked effectively as well. I guess in a way the humans won in the long run.

Football War (July 14, 1969 - July 18,1969)

This is my personal favorite. It’s June 8 1969, Honduras and El Salvador first battle on the 1970 FIFA Wolrd Cup qualification matches. Honduras wins the match 1-0 in the capital of Tegucigalpa, then June 15 El Salvador wins 3-0 in San Salvador but the Hondura fans gets mad and violent. During these events, there was a political issue between the two Hispanic countries over a land dispute and immigration problems. Causing huge buildup that people predicted there would be war, especially after the soccer match.

Then at the play off match in Mexico City in June 27 made a decisive game in of 3-2 in El Salvador's favor. 17 days after the match, the war started by the Salvadorian Air Force disabling airports that way Honduras doesn't have a quick reaction time and using passenger airplanes and strap bombs on them. At the same time they deployed troops to advance through Honduras by river, and up the mountains, using mechanized and artillery. They had a good push into Honduran territory nearly getting to the capital but not for long. Once the Honduran Air Force recovered, they targeted their oil deposits and ports, which was successful. They both had WWII era design aircraft, tanks and some weapons.

Then the OAS (Organization of American States) steps in to make a cease fire deal between them in 18th of July and withdrawal of Salvadorian forces. The war ended on the night of 18th of July and came full effect in July 20th. They called it "100 Hours war". Then his troops withdraw and they signed the peace treaty in October 30 1980.

The aftermath of the war was devastating for both countries, especially economically. The Salvadorians was eliminated after losing the first three matches. 300,000 Salvadorians were displaced, having to move away from the war torn Honduras to coming back to El Salvador, where it encountered overpopulation and extreme poverty. El Savador lost 900 civilians, Honduras lost 250 troops and 2,000 civilians. At least they've settled the land dispute and called it a peace zone. It also caused civil unrest in El Salvador to the point there was a civil war 1979.

That's about it. There's probably more wars that started for hilarious/ridiculous reasons. Thank you for taking your time reading and have a marvelous day.

-J