Relentlessly

I gave a man asking for change at the gas station a hoodie last night. It had been sitting in my trunk for a while, and I have more at home. The nights are getting colder. I gave a woman a fanny pack the week before that. She said she needed it, so I took it off my waist, emptied the contents into the front seat of my car, and handed her the bag. A hot pink Lululemon Christmas gift from a boss who spent our bonuses on trinkets we could use but not as much as the money. I didn't need it. I resented it but used it nonetheless. I took myself out today with my last twenty dollars for the week. The goal was to write and forget for a minute. But I'm asked for help by several people along the walk and give the twenty dollars away.

I'm always trying to help. Cigarettes, clothes, food, money, it doesn't matter. I'll give it up if I have it. Experience has taught me that no matter my needs, someone else's need is always greater. I know very well that I can afford to part with most things.

This was once a problem that needed interruption, but I've figured out how to help without putting myself in a worse position than before. I'm still constantly learning how to build community and help in the best way possible, but I've come a long way.

Pragmatism wasn't preached in my home, but I learned. Poverty necessitated it.

Here is some of what I now know:

If needed, a small pack of almonds can feed you for a week, maybe longer. Up your water intake to help with hunger and brain fog.

A car can be ridden in neutral down hills or coasting to conserve gas. Remember to slip it back into gear before accelerating.

Public Wi-Fi can save you money on internet and phone bills and is easily accessible at libraries. Most coffee shops have it, but you will need to find a good hiding spot within range of the signal. Make sure it is away from anyone trying to make you buy something to be there.

Food banks can be shit, but when you go, get there early. Get rice and get beans. Produce will be rotten in a day if you can even find any.

Despite what may be said, anything can be a bed when you don't have a mattress, bedroom, or home. I recommend selling your shit and couch surfing if that's an option. Piles of laundry work well in the back of a car. Rolled towels make good pillows. If you have a hammock, back-trails and woods are your best friends.

Getting a shovel and a rake helps. Doing yardwork for petty cash is quick and easy. Most people don't want to do it themselves and will pay well for someone to help.

Many pet stores have programs for people who cannot afford to feed their animals. Local bartering and trade platforms, social media, and Nextdoor are also good resources.

Peanut butter almost fills you like a meal.

Buy loosies when you're in a pinch.

ABATW. Always Be Applying to Welfare. The hoops are strenuous, but any assistance is better than none.

There's so much more, but I'd like to shift gears for my sanity before I conclude these thoughts. Reminiscing at this point feels like ruminating, so I'll move on for now.

What I have learned today looks a bit different than the survival skills of yesterday. Now, I know that safety is in the community you build. No one needs to survive alone. We should do what we can to lift others around us who need it most because they are us.