Latest Stories
Most recently published stories in Psyche.
Being an Anxious Introvert
Have you ever felt like your on anchor? Have you ever felt like you are just one of two people inside your body? Like you have this endless, raging fire burning inside of you that wants to concur the world...but then, something as strong as that fire pulls you down.
By Santia Desiree'8 years ago in Psyche
Living With Bipolar Disorder
Today I woke up on the sofa again. I feel safety and comfort in the corner of the sofa surrounded by pillows and my two cats. I leave the television on so the voices make me feel less alone. I go to the kitchen and make the first of many cups of coffee. I can use a box of K cups in one day. This box has 12 cups in it. I count my cigarettes because I am virtually penniless and don’t know how I’ll even buy my next pack. I contemplate quitting cigarettes but my current state of turmoil won’t let me. I wrack my brain trying to figure out how I’ll get through another day without money. It’s so isolating to feel this bad and have no one who understands, no one who can even deal with your presence because you have absolutely nothing left to give.
By Elizabeth Arnold8 years ago in Psyche
The "D" Word
I’m going to pretend that we’ve known each other forever. Or, maybe like we’re those two drunk people at the bar who aren’t dancing, but better yet we are sitting at tables beside each other with a drink, lonely. We make that initial eye contact that feels like that “Hey old friend!” greeting and we decide to spill our guts out to each other as we build a relationship over too many vodka sodas. Either way, this will probably be raw, and it’s going to be real. But like I’ve said before, I am not a doctor. This is through my eyes only and my own personal experiences ONLY. So here it is... Depression, coming from someone who struggles and fights the darkness every. damn. day.
By Jess Dobransky8 years ago in Psyche
Depression: The Silent Shadow
"It’s hard to even write when I’m this depressed. I can’t cry, I can’t eat. I can’t do anything. I feel so hopeless and so alone. I have the weight of the world in my soul. All I want to do is sleep, just to get away from everything. I feel trapped. I’m thinking about pills. Lord Jesus, I’m thinking about pills. Help me not to think about pills. I feel so alone, Lord. Who can I talk to about this? Will You even talk to me? I’m falling. Help"
By Fallon Bechtel8 years ago in Psyche
Here You Are... Again
It was mid December 2016 and I was on my way home from work. My surroundings that day were such a blur, I never remembered the time, the speed I was going, or any specifics of that moment other than what I felt myself go through. I was in Los Angeles, so the traffic was almost always bad. I do remember cars passing me by as I looked at the highway wall and thought, "Why not?" And just as that thought was settling on my mind I felt my tears running down my face. I do not even remember my thoughts prior this but that is when I realized I had just contemplated ending my life. I sat there, wondering, "how did I get to this point?" I felt confusion, but most of all I felt fear.
By Maritza Perez8 years ago in Psyche
It's Okay, You're Just Acting Crazy!
How do I put this into (appropriate) perspective? You wake up in the morning and you give yourself the 15th self exam of the 24 hours that have passed since you woke up yesterday. You roll out of bed (or maybe you don't) and you spend the next 12 hours checking for lumps, making your friends/family check you and themselves for lumps, wondering when you will be diagnosed with the one kind of cancer that has yet to be discovered (or maybe every single other kind of cancer that has already been discovered), reading WebMD articles to self diagnose your "symptoms," declining all offers to do anything after work because you want to spend however long you have left with your family, not believing your friends/family/DOCTORS when they say that these physical symptoms are all symptoms of your mental illness and not the cancer that you've convinced yourself that you have.
By Maya Passmore8 years ago in Psyche
What It Feels Like to Have Schizophrenia
Everything is loud. Here I will write about what it was like to have schizophrenia as a child, not know what it was, and not having a diagnosis I could tell people about that they would understand. These days, my experience in class means I feel less wound up overall, to the point of not being wound up at all, in fact, which makes me feel odd. For somebody with real psychic talent, the input comes hot and heavy: everybody’s energy, everybody’s aura colors. Not being on meds meant that I was helpless at regulating the input I got from my mind. As an adult, on the right medication, I’m able to see that I can regulate the input better. I can also shut it off since I took a class on the off switch.
By Iria Vasquez-Paez8 years ago in Psyche
