How to tell the difference between a Narcissist and a Psychopath

It is easy to distinguish between stereotypical narcissists from psychopaths. These are the main differences:

Antisocial vs. Prosocial

Psychopaths tend to be antisocial. They rebel against the laws and customs and are often antisocial. They may be hostile to social instincts and practices. They are proud of their antisocial behavior.

"It seems to me that such an argument ignores psychopaths' peculiar and astounding callousness. It also ignores that they take a positive, boastful pleasure in showing off their achievements in the midst a host of destructive, uninviting and antisocial activities. They seem to enjoy this as an exhibit of their prowess." -- Hervey Ceckley

Narcissists are generally prosocial. They need to be able to control their self-esteem. They want to be liked by others. They are also more mature than psychopaths in terms of their ability to build long-term and stable relationships.

DSM 5 -- Narcissistic personality disorder Alternative Criteria

Impairments in self-function (a or b).

a. Identity: Too much reference to others for self definition and self-esteem regulation. Exaggerated self appraisals may be exaggerated or deflated or oscillate between extremes. Emotional regulation mirrors fluctuations in self-esteem.

b. Self-direction. Goal setting is about gaining approval from others. Personal standards are too high to be considered exceptional or too low to feel entitled. Many people are unaware of their motivations.

Introverted vs Extraverted

Psychopaths tend to be lone wolves. Although they may be narcissistic, and love attention, unlike real narcissists, psychopaths aren't addicted to narcissistic supplies. This is a term that describes attention, admiration, and adulation. Psychopaths don't need attention to maintain their self-esteem. They prefer to be alone.

Both men struggled to commit themselves, and were therefore unable to build long-lasting relationships. They believed that 'Outside of sight, outof mind' was their motto. Relationships were temporary, fleeting things that could be used as needed. They didn't seem to feel the need to spend much time with other people. They rarely wrote to friends -- if they were absent, they were gone." Adolf Guggenbulhl Craig

Shallow Affect vs Mood Lability

Psychopaths are characterized by shallow emotions. Although they are able to feel most emotions, they lack the ability to experience them at the same levels as normal people. Narcissists are more able to attach and feel emotions than normal people. Narcissists are more likely to feel shame, but they also have the ability to feel guilt, remorse, and empathy. These traits are missing in the psychopath personality. Psychopaths, for example, don't display any signs of depression or mood lability.

A prosocial psychopath is another variant of the psychopath. It can look somewhat like a narcissist. This can cause confusion.

How do you differentiate?

Sexual Sadism & Sex Addiction

Narcissists and antisocial psychopaths are asexual and autoerotic. Although they may have a sex obsession, it is not rooted in sexual arousal. Narcissists often use sex to boost their self-esteem and feel better about themselves. However, the act of sex is almost equivalent to masturbating with another person's body. They are not addicted to sex, but the attention. Narcissists may be addicted to pornography. However, it is not unusual for them to experience erectile dysfunction and to be unable feel sexual desire. They often find their relationships becoming sexless.

Antisocial psychopaths often experience sexual deviancy, but this disappears after adolescence. The identification phenomenon with the aggressor is what causes their obsession with sex. They often view themselves as womanisers and sluts if they are sexually active. It's all about being controversial, outrageous and challenging the social norm. You will probably get proud disclosure if they were exposed to sexual sadism as a child. They are proud of their "f**ked-up" qualities, as well as any sexual desires.

Prosocial psychopaths on the other side are unlikely to reveal anything about themselves. They prefer to keep a socially acceptable and high-functioning image. Their obsession with sex stems from a real sex drive. They perceive power and control as sexually stimulating. Antisocial psychopaths, on the other hand, can feel sadistic and in control. These feelings can give them a rush of adrenaline or a high but they don't have any sexual components.

Shallow Affect

Both prosocial and antisocial psychopaths are known for having shallow emotions and reduced bonding abilities. Narcissists don't. They can, and do, form complete emotional attachments.

Prosocial and Appearance Conscious

"This patient is not a psychopath, but he shows very little disturbance to his social life. He has no evidence that he committed a series of thefts and forgeries. These crimes were repeated over and over again with full knowledge of the consequences. He has a good reputation for virtue and has avoided causing any distress to his friends or acquaintances with vividly antisocial acts, distasteful, and outrageous folly. He attends church every Sunday." -- Hervey Ceckley

Prosocial psychopaths are socially acceptable, much like narcissists. Prosocial psychopaths are less likely to offend others or try to shock people, as do antisocial psychopaths. Antisocial psychopaths may tell you, "I'm crazy" or "I'm dysfunctional," if you have the chance to meet them. Because they take pride in their actions and crimes, they may openly discuss them. The prosocial ones, on the other side, will present a stable and high functioning image.

No ADHD

Many antisocial psychopaths have co-morbid ADHD. Either they don't have ADHD, or the severity is less severe than the antisocial. Because their brains are mature, prosocial psychopaths tend to have higher functioning levels than other types of psychopaths. They aren't as impulsive and irresponsible. It is not uncommon to see a history of antisocial psychopaths that has a poor work record, financial incompetence, criminal records, and reckless behavior. This includes unmotivated antisocial acts. Similar to narcissists, prosocial psychopaths are more likely than others to have stable jobs and maintain good relationships.

At the surface, it appears polite.

He is not bound by any significant attachments and has the full time and energy to maintain superficial relationships. He is also able cultivate many friends with whom he feels a sense of popularity. He is not close enough to people in real personal relationships to understand his limitations and be understood. He is only able to offer a superficial level of warmth that is available to all. He offers little to no warmth to any friend, parent, or spouse. He is generally accepted as someone who demonstrates virtue and affability." -- Hervey Ceckley

Prosocial psychopaths keep their distance by not sharing any personal information and being vague in general. It feels unnatural to have a conversation with them. They are polite and nice, but it feels as though they are trying to perform or show off a bit too much. Their psychopathy is more hidden from the public.

While antisocial psychopaths may be less personal and more superficial in some aspects, they maintain distance through thinly disguised hostility or suspiciousness. They are more aggressive. While they can be more superficial than narcissists, they are more likely to be outright arrogant and derogatory. Overt narcissists can be openly pompous and rude, especially if they are not careful. Psychopaths, on the other hand, are often more subtly grandiose than their overt narcissist counterparts.

The Antisocial Psychopath and Narcissist are both developmental in-between

Personality disorders can be described as a form of retarded development. Antisocial behavior indicates a more primitive personality. Asexuality and autoeroticism are also signs of a primitive personality. Although small children may be autoerotic or asexual, they will eventually develop full sexuality. The ability to feel sexually stimulated by others points towards a more mature and developed personality. The inclination to prosocial behavior is also a sign of maturity. Prosocial psychopaths can still be emotionally shallow, and they cannot attach at the same level to narcissists. They are therefore likely to be less mature than them. Comparatively, the antisocial psychopath may be 3 years old while the prosocial variant can be found at 5 years, and the narcissist at 7-8 years.