The Turning

The Turning

Love is mine as surely as hate is mine.

Joy is mine as surely as sorrow is mine.

Pleasure is mine as surely as pain is mine.

I would turn hate into love.

I would turn sorrow into joy.

I would turn pain into pleasure.

If I turn hate it can’t turn me.

If I turn sorrow it can’t turn me.

If I turn pain it can’t turn me.

I live with hate so I can feel love.

I live with sorrow so I can feel joy.

I live with pain so I can feel pleasure.

I live.

I feel.

I turn.

***** * *****

I Should Like to Live

I should like to live

In a meaningful way.

I would like to become

That fulfilled soul

I always aspired to be.

No one needs to notice.

I just need to feel

That way about

Myself.

I should like to live.

***** * *****

Morbid Death Dream

He doesn’t know what to do with himself. A creature designed to feast, fight, fuck, and get high doesn’t belong here, pandering to a pacified society. He should have died years ago, in battle or on a bender, fighting the hordes or his own inner demons. But here he is, sitting at a desk, wishing he were dead.

He often thought he was past his expiration date.

He writes about himself in third person like his life is someone else’s morbid death dream.

***** * *****

Sanguine Sweet Love

Self-centered

Self pushes

The self

To the outside,

Bats it around

Like a cat

Toying with a mouse,

Terrifies it to death,

Presents it again

At the foot

Of the self.

A GIFT!

***** * *****

Nought. Zero. Zilch. Nada. Naught.

No one has to know about those random acts of kindness. It’s better that they don’t. There is no other way for us to be certain we did it for the right reasons. Not for the attention. Not for the vicarious-intravenous oxytocin-dopamine-serotonin-adrenaline chemical cocktail. Not for the mirror effect. Not to avoid punishment or reap reward. Not even for its own sake.

We come from nothing. We become nothing. To nothing we return.

***** * *****

IMAGINATION

Some thoughts are so profound that we wrestle with them as we would a large fish. We pull them up from such depths, but they are so massive, the line breaks… an everyday tragedy.

We can only imagine what sort of creature was about to emerge.

We must console ourselves with the sure knowledge that imagination was all we were ever trying to stimulate, and perhaps even be grateful lest we wrest a monster from the sea of our own troubled soul.

***** * *****

THE ROSE

I found a rose and I thought of you.

What wonder and beauty hides beneath the manifold soft petals?

If the loveliness, elegance, and sweet fragrance of the outside is any indication, then it is no wonder there are thorns on the stem.

We must pick this flower carefully, with great respect, but not for fear of laceration.

Rather should we fear dropping the flower and losing her forever to the wandering wind while we stand alone and bleed.

***** * *****

ENNUI

We all die one day,

And we only accrue it

To give it away,

So an overflowing cup

Can be a burden,

If not a waste.

Half-empty?

Half-full?

No, no, no, no… no.

To each their own!

Take your fill!

Meet your taste!

***** * *****

DAMNED PHILOSOPHER!

If anyone were to come to me and say:

“I want to be happy. Will the pursuit of knowledge make me happy?”

Emphatically, I would say: “No. There is no more certain way to deny oneself happiness than to pursue only knowledge.”

If someone were to come to me and say:

“I must have Truth! Will the pursuit of knowledge give me access to Truth?”

I would say: “Yes. You will never stop finding Truth while pursuing knowledge. If you are persistent, if you never rest in that pursuit, there will come a day when the knowledge you have accrued will be so far beyond that of your peers, that you will be incapable of giving it away. No one will want it. No one will want you, but only those small fragments of you that they can bear to understand.

This is why there is no more certain way to deny oneself happiness than to pursue knowledge.

No one wants knowledge, despite the certain knowledge that we all need Truth.

Everyone wants happiness. Therefore, choose wisely what you pursue. After all, it’s not a fork in the road. It’s your path to make. Pursue knowledge today, happiness tomorrow, or whatever is most consonant with your individual will.

LEAVE OTHERS FREE TO DO THE SAME.

There will be pain. You don’t have to pursue that. It comes with the territory.

That is Truth.

As for those of us who have pursued knowledge to the point of our own alienation and even damnation, we are left in the end with no other choice than to write it all down. We must give it away—we must.

Even if posthumously.

We call ourselves philosophers, though not one of us agrees with another about what that really means!

You’re welcome?”

***** * *****

IN LOVE

Can we grow

Rather than fall?