The moon and stars
came out to play,
At the end of a long hot day.
Low in the sky,
the sun caught the moons eye,
As she took in his beautiful glow.
He melted her heart
as his fires grew bright,
Til his departure turned dusk into night.
Glancing at the blushing moon,
a star asks “Why are you red?”
“I’ve been chasing the sun around the world,
to wave him goodnight before bed!”
The laughing comet crept up from behind,
“I know why she is red;
she really couldn’t avert her eyes,
from hot sun getting ready for bed!”
About the Creator
Hazel Rymell
..Suddenly I crash back down to earth with a big almighty bump!
...when not in a dolly daydream, creative me is at home in the UK doing the normal everyday mundane jobs, that seem to go on forever...until the daydreaming kicks in again...
Reader insights
Outstanding
Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!
Top insights
Heartfelt and relatable
The story invoked strong personal emotions
Easy to read and follow
Well-structured & engaging content
Compelling and original writing
Creative use of language & vocab
On-point and relevant
Writing reflected the title & theme
Eye opening
Niche topic & fresh perspectives
Excellent storytelling
Original narrative & well developed characters
Masterful proofreading
Zero grammar & spelling mistakes
Expert insights and opinions
Arguments were carefully researched and presented
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Day 4 of Quitting
If this is how sobriety feels, maybe it’s better to go through life a little buzzed… this, along with other hits like, I want to kill myself, I wish I was dead, and I’m going to throw myself off a bridge have been the only thoughts on rotation these past few days. I promise myself that if, in a month, I still feel like this (‘this’ meaning despondent, full of rage, and simultaneously numb) I can go back to smoking. Until mid-February though? Nicotine is off the table.
By sleepy drafts6 days ago in Longevity
Comments (25)
There is so much to love about this poem. Well done!
A beautiful poem that I missed
I didn't notice the read moon last night, but your poem is great!!
This is really very creative and beautifully written. Very good job Hazel.
I really love the dreamlike language, chasing the sun around the world is such a beautiful line, and the comet observation brings it full circle. ❤️
This had such a nice feel. A very enchanting poem. I kept thinking of a narrator in my head reading this poem with illustrations like the way they do in movies sometimes.
This is so beautiful; I read this previously but enjoyed it just as much the second time!
The use of personification, assigning human qualities to the moon, sun, and stars, adds a sense of enchantment to the scene. The poem's rhyme scheme and playful tone make it a delightful read. Overall, it is a charming and imaginative take on the beauty of the night sky. Its blend of romance and humor creates a delightful and memorable piece.
hahaha, simple and cute ;)
This was joy to read, nice work.
Love love love 😍 ✨🎯😉
So cute and charming!
Very cute 🥰
Cute personifications 🌞🌚
This comment has been deleted
Congrats on the top story - well deserved.
Loved the moon blushing for chasing the sun and the comet laughing. This was so fun and sweet :) Congratulations on Top Story!
I love this!! Absolutely wonderful! <3
This is so beautiful; I really loved the line about chasing the sun around. 😍 Excellent and well-done!
Hearted and subscribed
Very sweet poem ❤️ I also love anything with the moon🌛
The answers are all there, they are just good at hiding from us, great work
That is lovely, the first piece of yours that I have read, so impressed I have subscribed
This is great. love it.
I'm a sucker for a moon poem - this was so cute! Fantastic! :)