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Something Stupid

Because I got nothing else. You're welcome!

By Cathy holmesPublished 3 years ago 1 min read
Photo by Michael Matlon on Unsplash

I wanted to write something stupid

To remind me of just who I am

Not really suggesting I’m stupid

But somedays I’ve the IQ of a yam

*

When my brain feels all pale and starchy

With tough skin that thoughts cannot pierce

I know that my mind has gone marshy

So I might as well think with my arse

*

So here is the shit that I’m writing

I just hope that it doesn’t all stink

If you read while my thoughts are igniting

You might need to pour a stiff drink

*

I started out self-deprecating,

Then insulted a fucking potato

Next my brain began defecating

While my mind got drunk on the patio

*

I think it’s near time that I end this.

Since my poem is a rickety rail car

It never made sense to begin with

And I fear that I’ve travelled too far

*

But if you’re still reading my drivel

There’s something I think you should know

I may have the IQ of a tuber

But you are as stubborn as a goat

(Final line can be taken as the animal or acronym - both apply equally.)

humor

About the Creator

Cathy holmes

Canadian family girl with a recently discovered love for writing. Other loves include animals and sports.

Reader insights

Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

Top insights

  1. Excellent storytelling

    Original narrative & well developed characters

  2. Easy to read and follow

    Well-structured & engaging content

  3. Expert insights and opinions

    Arguments were carefully researched and presented

  1. Eye opening

    Niche topic & fresh perspectives

  2. Heartfelt and relatable

    The story invoked strong personal emotions

  3. Masterful proofreading

    Zero grammar & spelling mistakes

  4. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

  5. On-point and relevant

    Writing reflected the title & theme

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Comments (21)

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  • JBaz2 years ago

    I needed a laugh today and said to myself .. self I said, go read something from Cathy. And I came across this beauty. So thanks, now I can survive another hour long meeting

  • Donna Renee3 years ago

    How did I miss this? 🤣🤣🤣 I’m absolutely here for the chaos and potato insults 🤣👏

  • Gina C.3 years ago

    Fun read, my friend! So many lines in here 😅 "I started out self-deprecating, Then insulted a fucking potato"... honestly *hugs* but the way this came out made me giggle 😅🥹❤️❤️

  • Simply delightful. And I'd say you have me pegged.

  • sleepy drafts3 years ago

    😂💓 Oh my goodness, this was funny.

  • Lamar Wiggins3 years ago

    😅. Ahhhh, you know us all too well. Thanks for the laugh, Cathy.

  • I wanna be the animal goat! Weeeee! Also, if you have an IQ of a tuber, then I wonder what's mine 🤣🤣🤣 Loved your stupid poem! Lol! Also, Happy Birthday! 🎂💖

  • Hahaha love this Cathy 😂

  • Sharon Bethea3 years ago

    Hilarious, but sometimes I have a IQ of a yam that’s my favorite food🤣 laughter does the body good!

  • Misty Rae3 years ago

    OMG, I laughed way too hard at this! "So I might as well think with my arse!" There's never been a line that screams Atlantic Canada like that!

  • 😅🤣😂😅🤣😂🤣

  • Dana Crandell3 years ago

    That was a lot of fun! I'm glad you gave us the option on the last line. I'd never lay claim to the acronym, and the other option goes well with "old,", so...

  • Mariann Carroll3 years ago

    We all have this moments but only you can turn into humor 🤣😉

  • This was af un wake up, I am going to shower and then to Scotland

  • J. S. Wade3 years ago

    Wouldn’t it be something if Vocal held a Vocal Con!! And we could roast each other. 😂🥰

  • Okay from the last line- Lmao 🤣I'm insulted in a Hilarious way❗ You are Awesome 👍 😊📝❤️ -I laughed out loud so hard with that potato line 😁

  • Clyde E. Dawkins3 years ago

    LOL very nice and funny!

  • Dana Stewart3 years ago

    I needed a good laugh. This is so funny, you incredible yam. Also, I read it as arse-y first go.

  • Oh, Cathy, bless you. Just when I needed a laugh ....

  • Babs Iverson3 years ago

    Fun & funnier!!! Loved it!!!❤️❤️💕

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