Scary.

It's scary

How i loved but never knew love

It's like i missed it

the whole Conception of the thought

The belief system

Because of that i thought

I loved

When the reality was

I just cared to much about someone

who only saw my flaws.

Ironic

Isn't it?

Many people and when i say many

I mean a great amount

Always complimented me on self awareness.

Of how aware of myself i was.

My flaws, weaknesses, strengths

And the fact that i never had to play life by ear.

Because i knew exactly what i was capable of.

That was before i met him

I knew jack shit about love

But I felt comfortable, I think.

I felt needed, wanted and for a moment

Loved.

Granted, I was just hooked on something

I thought was real.

Until My super power kicked in.

Self Awareness,

In some twisted reality

I woke up

Like someone decided

It was time to splash me with cold fucking water

And Believe me i woke straight up.

Flying through this dream.

God had enough, he wanted me to see

How fucking toxic this shit was.

Like Today, I made Fried rice

He said it tasted good.

A few hours later when I ate spaghetti

left in the fridge.

I suddenly became a selfish person,

who only thinks of herself.

And who rice tasted like just rice and Salt.

Fuck.

So i Bossed Up.

Making My Money

I wore a fucking Cape

Super Hero that shit.

I wasn't about to let a guy

Control me

Allow me to lose my shit.

Shut that Bull down.

Because i love me more

Than i WOULD EVER care about him.

I know that now.