ONE DAY

One day

I’ll embrace love when it feels perfect,

I’ll cherish my body when I grow older and hopefully get work done,

I’ll be emotionally open, not stuck up,

I’ll hold on to love someday when mentally ready for commitment,

For now, I’ll merely go along with the flings.

_____

I’ll be kinder to my loved ones when tough times pass,

I must get my life on track,

So I isolate myself, as I become numb

Drowning in trauma and fatigue.

But one day I’ll reclaim all I’ve ignored

When it feels right, I will return, fully restored.

____

Years have passed,

Nothing seems to have changed,

Put all my dreams on hold,

My bucket list cast far away as I surrender

To the heavy tides of life’s blowing me wherever it virulently wishes

_____

But I remain swept away and trapped in the middle of the seas,

Soon to be drifted far away from the shores

And I sink, gazing at all I once knew.

My vain searches amount to nothing,

Everything I needed lies ashore

as I’m carried away by waves despite my fighting.

___

Everyone beckoning me where i began,

Where my treasures await.

How could I have missed it all?

When did I get carried away and blinded?

It’s too late to swim back now,

Too ashamed to even wave goodbye.

_____

I stayed wishing and hoping for a day everything gets better,

I was too afraid to live in my now.

A one day for me now is not forthcoming,

I wish I tried to control my today instead of my shortcomings.