On a night like this

It’s a warm night, a balmy night. The last bit of moisture from a late summer storm hangs in the air.

She sits quiet and thoughtful, a glass of crisp, cold wine in hand.

A silent tear drop rolls down her cheek, leaving behind a streak in her carefully applied makeup.

The soft sounds of soulful music drift through the open window in attempt to offer comfort.

In a melancholy and retrospective state her mind wanders.

She will always be the “look at the pretty sky” girl. The one who takes pictures of big fluffy clouds, stares in wonder at the moon and wishes upon stars.

In a world where love letters have been replaced with the oh so romantic “WYD” text; she still leaves little hand written notes in home made lunches.

She sings passionately, though not well, to songs who’s lyrics she feels deep in her bones.

While most strive for bountiful bank accounts, perfect bodies and a social media presence…. She strives for a home big enough for her family to come for Thanksgiving, shows love through food, and feels awkward every time she posts a selfie.

She won’t tell you what’s important to her or what’s bothering her unless she feels safe. She’s rarely ever felt safe with anyone.

After many heartbreaks,bullying, abuse, and learning most people are inherently selfish, somehow she still chooses to love with her whole self.

She still hopes for the bare minimum-consistent communication and respect. But deep down what she really wants is someone to choose her, to see her, to put her first.

There are days she wonders how her life ended up this way. How did she end up here? Sitting alone, crying and thoughtful on a warm summer night.

She knows that no one is perfect, that there will be tears. But what she really wants is to find more peace for the rest of her years.

One thing is for sure, despite all of the reasons to be sad or distraught, she was raised with one important thought.

“Farlo Con Grazia” is what she was taught.