My Shiny Unicorn
He kinda stinks (Blame Dana and JBaz for this)
I met a shiny unicorn who fell out of my ass.
I didn’t mean for it to happen, thought it was just gas.
So now I’ve got this creature, who stinks from head to toe,
And has forced me on a journey to the end of a rainbow.
*
His nose is bright and twinkly, his smile lights up my day.
His fur is soft as feathers, from the comfiest duvet.
His horn, it sparkles with gold dust, his eyes could cast a spell.
I think that I could love him if I could just get past the smell.
*
His voice is mostly child-like, quite often soft, and sweet,
But when the rain does fall at night, he howls like a cat in heat.
I stuff a pillow over my head to drown the horrendous sound.
I’d shove his horn right up his butt if I could get him turned around.
*
So, weeks into our journey to the end of the rainbow,
My legs are aching, my back is killing me, and I can’t feel my toes.
Along he trots beside me, all charm and full of grace.
If I had the strength, I’d smack the smile right off his sparkly face.
*
Eureka! There I see it. Is that a pot of gold?
Have we reached our destination? Dare I wish so bold?
It seems our journey’s over. No more together we’ll roam.
The rainbow glows with outstretched arms to call my unicorn home.
*
He turns and looks toward me, then bows on bended knee.
His ways of showing endearing friendship and gratitude to me.
I don’t know why I’m feeling sad, as my eyes they start to swell.
I think I’ll miss my sparkly friend, but I sure won’t miss the smell.
------
All I can say is I'm sorry, and that you can blame JBaz and Dana C. for this mess.
About the Creator
Cathy holmes
Canadian family girl with a recently discovered love for writing. Other loves include animals and sports.
Reader insights
Outstanding
Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!
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Excellent storytelling
Original narrative & well developed characters
Eye opening
Niche topic & fresh perspectives
Compelling and original writing
Creative use of language & vocab
Easy to read and follow
Well-structured & engaging content
Masterful proofreading
Zero grammar & spelling mistakes
On-point and relevant
Writing reflected the title & theme
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Comments (47)
It sure is a different take on things. I dont call them unicorns though, popping out of there. congrats
Hehehe ... BEST! Congratulations on Top Story and 1st Place! Well deserved recognition!
1st Place . yeah! congratulations
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣Thank you JBaz and Dana C.😂😂
❤️ Simply amazing!
Remarkable job! Maintain the fantastic work—congrats!
Really made me giggle!
It's giving twisted child book 😂 lol
Don't apologize everybody needs a bit of messy humour from time to time
Amazing write up and keep up the good work.
This reminds me of my childhood... like which girl didn't have a unicorn era?😆
Oh my goodness, I absolutely loved this. great job very inventive.
🤣🤣🤣 you should write a kids poetry book. My son will love this!
☺️👏 …I mean, gross! 😆
If the unicorn plopped out of there I'm scared to know what other secrets lie there as well. I don't know why, but a unicorn falling out of somebody's butt sounds like somebody purposefully ate glitter in the desperate attempt to jot dealing with the mess of glitter everywhere, everywhen.
What a hilarious take! But I have so many questions, primarily…did it hurt when the unicorn came out of your a**? 🤣🤣🤣
Hahaha!! This was brilliant Cathy!! I love your take on this "challenge"!!
Looks like your smelly, sparkly friend gifted you a Top Story! Congratulations! 🎉💖🎊🎉💖🎊
This had me hooked from the first line. Reminds me of Roger McGough!
Now, that is some funny shit! Loved it! Congrats
This is entirely hilarious, Cathy. My sides are splitting. A very funny and well-written poem.
Hysterical! Any other mystical creatures come out of your ass? Sorry. Too personal.
Kinda reminded me of Shel Silverstein ! Very funny and clever . Congratulations on top story 👏
No doubt I would see you here today, congrats!!
This had no place to go but Top Story. I’m still laughing, and you had my wife choking with laughter. CONGRATULATION