Memento Mori No More

I think the always waiting for the other foot to drop or in this case rest of the word really worked well for the subject matter. The inevitable comes and yet so often it feels unexpected. And those of us who still remain feel off beat ever after in some way. This mirrored that sensation in a very effective way

There’s a lot packed into this. It's raw and striking. It stays with you. Thanks for sharing something so bold.

The interesting thing about this form is that it provoked my brain to select different words almost every time you broke one between lines. It really illustrates how we tend to miss things to include the point of a piece. Even though you broke up Allen’s name over and over, I don’t think I read it correctly a single time. It forced me to reread it again and again. We live fractured lives like Allen (we are Allen), like a fractured poem about life, misery and death. Like in your poem, we are disenfranchised from our lives.

An odd mix of Thomas Hardy and e.e. cummings. Very effective work done in my grey matter, Mr. Stewart!

Is the Inferno hidden in the way you broke the lines? 😃 Joke aside,I really liked the idea of the unusual breaking of the lines, but had to read it a couple of times to understand (I'm not native English speaker so my brain went like 🌋🌋🌋) I think the beauty of poetry lies in the way others interpret it. Once we let the poem go live its own life, we have no control of how it's received. I still get shocked sometimes what people read into mines. Like things I never even thought about while writing.

I actually really loved it on the second reading - it took me a minute to get used to the split words (I’m old and short sighted!) but second time around I was like - cool! You are so brave and clever with your experiments. I am way too scared to try new stuff. Good on you Paul.

Gosh that took me so long to read, lol. Nice little experiment, Sir Paul 🍩🥐

Interesting, Paul For me, I found it a bit difficult to take in but I'm a rhyming person that likes consistency, so don't take any notice of me. Hats off for breaking the mold though.

It's like a cipher you decode while reading it. I am all for experimental pieces, nicely done.

If you want an interpretation from a mind that can't see a tree in a forest, then here's mine: felt like someone was falling apart, worried about death after seeing it so many times. But then put back together (mostly) at the end after accepting there's more to life. If that's completely wrong, I apologise, haha :) But I enjoyed reading, Paul.