Lessons I Learned From My Hair.
Reflections In Coils And Care.
I praise You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made
(Psalm 139:14)
My hair does not yield easily.
I wash it weekly
condition it with patience
coat it in leave-in treatment
and steam it under a shower cap each night
tied tight so it softens in its own time.
I have considered using heat
to make it lie flat and shine
but heat cannot hide its truth
it tempts for a while
then leaves strands breaking
no matter the oils or serums or careful touch.
I have braided it
I have dyed it
and learned that dyeing betrays
its authentic self
I whisper sorry to myself
sorry for trying to be someone else
I do not want to be that person.
Morning comes
and still it resists
softness earned in small portions
each strand a lesson in patience
Combing is careful negotiation
a dialogue between my fingers and its spirit.
Eventually it relents
soft enough to gather
to rise in buns sometimes three
sometimes five
even without braids
even without heat
even without color
it is enough.
Like my hair
I need gentleness
tenderness
space to stretch without strain
When pressed hard into tight shapes
I fracture.
I am a mirror of my hair
resilient, proud
beautiful in my own rhythm
happy in my own skin
requiring care
and understanding
to flourish.
About the Creator
Cathy (Christine Acheini) Ben-Ameh.
https://linktr.ee/cathybenameh
Passionate blogger sharing insights on lifestyle, music and personal growth.
⭐Shortlisted on The Creative Future Writers Awards 2025.
Keep reading
More stories from Cathy (Christine Acheini) Ben-Ameh. and writers in Poets and other communities.
📢 Raise Your Voice Thread: 01/08/2026
Our “Raise Your Voice Threads” are hosted most alternating Thursdays at 12PM ET to offer creators more avenues to uncover exceptional stories on Vocal. As we are continuously searching for fresh creators and inspiring stories, this thread provides an opportunity to exchange and discuss the stories that have moved and motivated us on Vocal.
By Raise Your Voice by Vocal7 days ago in Resources
Comments (6)
😱 This piece was breathtaking! So beautiful, uplifting, powerful & strong! Thx 4 repping for us Cotton Candy puff queens! This felt like an ultra sweet glass of pink lemonade in the desert! Go gurl! This is a national treasure! Thx 4 sharing! 🫶🏾💪🏾🥰
Cathy, this is such a beautiful reflection! My youngest daughter has had many of the same encounters. She has done it all, even shaving her head bald, at one point. Today, she wears her natural afro proudly, and I think she is stunning. But this goes beyond the hair, to all of her struggles growing up with self-esteem issues, some stemming from mean children at school. I love this to pieces, and smile, thinking how far my baby girl has come.
This is a very beautiful comparison and plea for understanding between the hair and the human. Nicely done, Cathy.
It's so nice to think that we are a reflection of our hair. Your poem was so powerful. I loved it!
I understand this poem. I tried a relaxer once, and my hair fell out. I told God if my hair stops falling out, I will never relax my hair again. We need to appreciate our hair and style it to fit its texture. I leave my conditioner in as well.
And hair so like the human spirit. Well done Cathy.