Interstellar public notice / Transmission 7A07 Alpha-Gamma

Beep beep … Attention all sentient, semi-sentient, and tentatively curious life forms in nearby galaxies:

This is a formal advisory regarding Planet Earth, otherwise known as the Third Rock from the Sun

Classified under Active Risk: Self-inflicted.

Approach to Earth is currently highly discouraged, not recommended, avoid at all cost.

Recent planetary assessments confirm escalating instability within the planet’s governance systems.

Of particular concern is a recurrent toddler-led leadership anomaly:

A high-visibility humanoid life-form exhibiting serious impaired judgement,

Grandiose territorial claims,

And an unsanctioned fixation on escalating global dominance,

Including, but not limited to, hostile posturing towards allied regions

Over ice, maps, and symbolic ownership of landmass known as Greenland.

In spite of multiple warnings, all internal safeguards have failed to engage.

Diplomatic language has been replaced by threats, slogans, insults, tariffs,

And impulsive declarations transmitted at rather irregular earthling hours.

Earth remains rich in culture, art, music,

And random small acts of kindness performed daily by simple earthlings who call themselves 'civilians'

And who did not authorise this trajectory of events.

However, these features are presently outweighed

By highly elevated probabilities of conflict, general collapse,

And spectacular administrative error.

For your own safety,

Please, postpone visiting until further notice,

Regime stabilisation,

Or planetary reboot.

This message will repeat. Beep beep ...