I Could Never Love You The Way That You Deserve

I never loved you,

not the way you deserved,

and how you loved me, I never knew,

but it left me unnerved.

My world was destroyed before I was an adult,

long before knowing you, my old friend,

and what I felt for you I never thought I'd have felt,

and tears poured from my eyes when it came to an end.

I held against you so many others sins,

and some you knew somehow,

some of them just whispers in the winds.

Trust that life with you was a series of wow.

Letting go of sins is where I need to begin,

if I ever hope to truly love someone.

If I find it in my heart then maybe I can win,

and against the old ghost, I will have won.

The past is two things, and they are good and bad,

I tried to keep them both.

Doing that has hurt me, and left me often sad,

because that has kept me from letting anyone get close.

I wish I could have loved you,

the way that you deserved.

Afraid you'll die as one, never being a part of a two,

knowing that I lost you is paying for a sin I was served.

Doomed I am my dear old friend,

living just half a life,

looking back through history,

wondering if I'm the wrong man's wife.

Forever I'll wish we met in a different time

and came unto me somewhere else in time and space.

I wish I could have loved you, and made you only mine,

fearing I'll forget the long-ago joy on your face.

I see you in the stores, and out about the town,

wondering why you're always alone.

I own that I'm the one that gave you that frown,

and in my heart, it hurts to always see you on your own.

Never can I tell you, how much to me you mean,

hoping that from afar you can feel my astral hug.

I hope someday you can forgive and know that your pain is seen,

forever and always you'll be my one true love.

I wish that I could have loved you,

the way that you loved me, the way that you deserved.

I wish I could have loved you,

but I pushed you away, and forever will I hurt.