I am learning to live

I'm learning to build a lake amidst a field of fire,

Silent sleep in a dungeon of howlers.

Even if the water burns my skin

Or every nap is a nightmare,

I'm learning to live,

With sympathy for my twin in the mirror,

Apologizing to little me for nearing her to the edge

I'm learning to survive,

ashen trees and thunderous sky.

I laugh and I dry tears from my eyes

After a night’s sleep I want to sleep a little more

I have a spring in my bed,

Pushing me up saying

see if your dream comes true today.

Dreams before I sleep, dreams I see after I awake

So many dreams and just one long day of grim grey sky

But I'm learning, after believing I was better asleep

I'm learning to believe the grey sky is just as pretty.

As a spectator to the film of my life

I stay the rogue woman, the raging child

A character they loathe for crying out loud.

But I'm here still,

holding the sun in my palm

And stars in my eyes

Taking every path so similar to the last one

Believing it to lead to different destination

A silly fight for a new season every new day.

Because, I’m learning

So long after birth, I’m still learning

To breathe, smile, talk, and face my own self.

I’m learning and failing

Learning again to dream and to love

And falling in love with my dreams along the way.

Initially published on medium

https://medium.com/scribers-nook/learning-d4933bca3882