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Hell for Stagecoach Drivers

2025 Story #16

By TheSpinstress Published 4 months ago Updated 4 months ago 1 min read
Hell for Stagecoach Drivers
Photo by vale on Unsplash

It will always be raining

and they will always arrive

at the stop just three seconds

too late and the demon drivers

will smirk as they pull off

in the sweetly heated electric buses.

And if those drivers do decide

to let the Punished on, not out

of pity (they haven't got any)

but just because the engine has exploded

or it's a timing stop, they will refuse

to try to understand the stumbling

second-language pronunciation of Kfz⸮zghlaolz*

(stress on the second z, unless

you're from the fifth circle) and keep shouting

"What? What? I don't know where you mean, mate!"

until the Punished blushes crimson as a double-decker.

And it's not like the demon drivers

don't follow the rules of the road,

just that Hell for Stagecoach Drivers

doubles up as Hell for Traffic Police

so a lot of squealing horns and gargly swearing

out the window is mandatory.

And they will always fail to hear the bell

over the screams of the Damned

and so always miss the Punished's stop,

and the next stop will be

very, very far away

and they will have to carry their shopping bags

all the way back and

it will always be raining.

.

NB - Demon is entirely unphonetic. It's pronounced Foz by the locals, but they won't tell you that, just laugh when you leave the room.

By Marino Linic on Unsplash

I saw a bus driver do that fake-ignoring thing they love so much on some poor guy who arrived at the stop just as he closed his doors earlier, outside the hospital, no less.

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About the Creator

TheSpinstress

New bio in progress :)

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Comments (6)

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  • Courtney Jones4 days ago

    I loved how funny this is on the surface, but how relentlessly cruel it becomes the longer it goes on. Great read!

  • Aarish3 months ago

    The language is playful and inventive, with unexpected word choices and phonetic jokes adding charm. The work balances narrative wit with a strong visual sense.

  • Komal4 months ago

    I love how you turned a mundane annoyance into a fully realized hellscape. Absolute nightmare fuel for public transport users. I’m simultaneously laughing and reconsidering every bus ride I take… 💖

  • Omgggg, I feel so sad for that guy 🥺 Loved your poem!

  • Rachel Deeming4 months ago

    Such a power trip! Little people in my opinion.

  • Mariann Carroll4 months ago

    What ride! Nice story telling.looks like you had blast writing this 😊

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