Happenstance

That smile

Intense dark eyes

Seemingly from

Nowhere and everywhere

Such intensity

I never notice such things

Men specifically

There’s too much

I must carry

Too much to handle

To anticipate

I rarely look up

Let alone at

A face

Looking back at me

With such a whimsical

Smile and eyes so deep

I felt them look straight

Into my soul

I Never even considered

Such a moment of

Depth and interconnection

Not for me

Not at this juncture

In fact, not ever again…

Had I Considered

Such an acquaintance

Of pure and simple

Gentle

Connection

Possible

That window was shut

I was adamant

So, maybe it was just

A dream

Created to occasionally revisit

In my thoughts

But never get lost

I can’t afford emotionally

What this unknown variable

Could potentially inflict

My heart will shatter like glass

Thousands of shards

Irreplaceable

Impossible to ever reconnect or repair

Like the tiniest puzzle pieces

Known to man

It can’t be done

He needs me more

So, I must shut every door

Every window

Unwittingly left cracked

I somehow wasn’t aware

I left any open as a

Means for contact

I was sure they were bolted

Shut and impregnable

All of them

It’s not real

It mustn’t be

No-

Not now

The memory is nice

It must stay an illusion

Kept hidden in my memory

Perhaps, I Created it to keep me going

I am still a vibrant woman

Cheers to you

With your beautiful eyes

And darling smile

He needs me more

I can’t break

Not ever

Never again