Grief gone past

There's an odd feeling when you realize

something you've always known,

Deep down in the thoughts and emotions

you dare not speak and acknowledge.

When you realize that the only feeling

is a mixture of numb acceptance and muted relief.

And only a moment to realize you've already grieved,

in a hundred thousand moments before.

Little griefs, so subtle you don't realize them,

over years of change and stagnated retrograde,

a hundred thousand times before.

The grief of who you were,

who you were supposed to be,

and who you could have been,

And a relationship burned and blown away.