puppies sleep in silky puddles
collapsing in exhausted release
unconcerned abandon often underfoot
trust and assurance a comforting embrace
genetic vigilance tamed
sleep comes easily
we watch, admire
-*-*-*-*
some people
-me-
can be tired but not sleepy
hypervigilant fending off rest
just one more page/game/post/screen
finally prone then sounds call my eyes open
my mind's ears scan for danger
{checks phone one more time}
then falling down down down
through velvet/night/darkness safeguards until
finally
quiet
hypersomnia reigns
and blots out all but dreams
no alarm can wake me
no call bring me back
immobile unreactive
it's not that I don't care
I care too much
aren't we all safely to morning?
fight flight freeze my mind
give me rest
-*-*-*-*-*
Complex Trauma (CPTSD) and Childhood Trauma are strongly corelated to sleep disorders.
Difficulty falling asleep, difficulty staying asleep, difficulty waking: all can be symptoms of a nervous system that stays on high alert. Subconsciously scanning for harm and remaining prepared for trouble, the body fights sleep and/or doesn't allow restful sleep.
Once asleep and finally entering core and deep sleep, the dysregulation of hormones can make a person immune to even the brightest lights or loudest alarms.
About the Creator
Judey Kalchik
It's my time to find and use my voice.
Poetry, short stories, memories, and a lot of things I think and wish I'd known a long time ago.
You can also find me on Medium
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More stories from Judey Kalchik and writers in Poets and other communities.
Day 4 of Quitting
If this is how sobriety feels, maybe it’s better to go through life a little buzzed… this, along with other hits like, I want to kill myself, I wish I was dead, and I’m going to throw myself off a bridge have been the only thoughts on rotation these past few days. I promise myself that if, in a month, I still feel like this (‘this’ meaning despondent, full of rage, and simultaneously numb) I can go back to smoking. Until mid-February though? Nicotine is off the table.
By sleepy drafts6 days ago in Longevity
Comments (11)
Jk - Puppy 'Plotz' Sleep is so enviable: Only prob with puppies is they grow up; best kissers, ever. Social media sez "very bad to kiss your dogs." Yeah, sure that'll keep me away. Fun Piece, jk#2 in once lovely l.a.
Nicely done and good info. I don’t have that but do wake easily, not hyper vigilant, just hear every little noise. Sleep gets worse with age too….
This piece is like a tired sigh with a big dose of realness! It contrasts easy puppy naps with the struggle of a mind that just won’t switch off. The mix of wanting rest and fighting it all at once is so relatable. Plus, the way it paints the struggle with sleep, but in such a chill, raw way—love it!
Very interesting piece. I have nights where I can't sleep, I think because I can't turn my brain off.
Great piece of writing you have here. I learned something new.
We still maintain some deep primial instincts, no matter how far we have evolved
Very instructive piece. Nice.
Nice sharing with a puppy picture.
Informative and a great poem. Thanks for sharing this with us, so interesting!
So well written!
Powerful!