Friend and Foe

My lonely companion of empty darkness

And lowly self-doubt,

I know you only too well.

Often have you moved to press close at my side

To slide your blackened tongues of bitter truth

Into my waiting ear.

Often have you vanquished my haughty pride

And crashed through stone to hardened heart

That I might hear.

And while at times I know you

As a trusted friend

Who has led me to the foot of this

Glorious Throne time and again,

I cannot always know you thus

For friends do not outstay their welcome.

In times when thanks to you

I know my deepest need

I thrill at your hollow presence.

I know that in such moments only you

Can lead me where I need to go

- Into loving arms, forgiving and true -

But no!

I cannot bear to have you linger.

Why burden me beyond your purpose?

I would have you leave!

An insubstantial shadow now

Of blackened emptiness.

Unwelcome you are beyond this time

Of humble cry and holy tears

When daggers of deep regret pierce

And I confess.

Go now and cease to stoke

These shameful fears.

Dear vehicle of my repentance,

This destination is the only place

I’d have you take me.

Go. This is our end.

If you are truly friend

And messenger of my beloved conscience

Bother me no more,

For to do so would destroy

All that we have now built.

Sleep until such time as I

Transgress my holy inner law,

When once again you’ll be my friend,

My Guilt…

by Alaric Goldkuhl