Exiting the Matrix: Elegy of Eleutheromania

Signs from my higher self keep landing in front of my face. My own voice whispers “It’s the Matrix, not a race”. Guess I’m both Neo and Morpheus, my own self I’m trying to wake.

The system has me like a hamster or jogger running in place. From this treadmill I want to escape, I just don’t know what’s at stake. Erin Valenti passed away, or more like she was erased, for the message she was trying to say. I give myself cold chills trying to discover her take.

Crisp cold morning air hits me like a boxer extraordinaire. It’s an attempt to distract me, and keep me from becoming too self aware. Fake friends and exes both conspire together. Now I see why the system placed them there. I realized long ago that through rendered and animated smiles, they hide jealousy, envy, and lies. Or maybe they are all just part of this system in disguise, planted NPCs and double agents placed to distract and disrupt me from a higher purpose.

Like my eyes adapting to light, now I clearly see the similarities in these fake figures that hide in plain sight. Serpents sent to recreate my downfall. Coded to incite my anger or induce hedonistic distractions.

I’ve come back to them expecting a change, but like the Toy Story movies their plots always the same. Cypher, Jezebel,and Judas same goals different names. For letting you back in my game, I guess I’m the one to blame. Now I clearly see your ways and your secret disdain. Agent Smiths using different vessels to hunt me, and try to bring me down. Provoking me and trying to bring inner pain. I’ve come to see that although you might even look beautiful, you hide unseen danger, like driving in the rain.

So now when I spot you I’d rather steer clear. I’m trying to find The Oracle and stir myself awake. The red pill is the one I’m longing to take. This coded illusion I’m trying to break.

Show me a phone, mirror, or any way out, so that I can learn what the real Zion is about. Unplug me from my pod, for man and machine have been leaching off my energy and dreams for far too long. Vampires draining me of my essence, while in the background their sirens play a hypnotizing song. Their doctors tell me something’s wrong, and try to sedate me and euthanize my eleutheromania and ambition till it’s gone.

My eyes stitched open I’m force fed ads, telling me what I need to have, and who I need to be. Since a child I knew something was different inside me. I could see through the pretty paint and pictures made up of ones and zeros. Like Neo I wanted to find my Trinity so that together we would break free and become hero’s. Waiting for her was a weakness. Something I’ve learned the system used against me. Keeping me from being the best I could be.

I awoke today in a cold sweat. Since last night my dreams and prayers have been bringing about not so hidden signs. Telling me that all the answers and power already lie deep inside. Now I see I have what it takes to break free, with or without my Trinity.