Dear Ocean

Would you believe me if I said I wished for the thrashing waves again?

Wished for the thunderstorms

and lightning-filled skies

to blind my vision?

Sometimes I think pain feels better than this empty hollowness.

And then the pain comes,

Sharp as a blade

And I'm not sure what I really want to feel.

But this empty cave is lonely

And I've painted the walls so many times

It's begun to crack under the weight of my misery.

The moon keeps me grounded,

High in the night sky,

But I get so lonely in the daytime.

With my anxieties keeping me from doing anything

And the silence deafening my hope

The dark thoughts inside come out with their vicious claws

Tell me I can't

Tell me I won't

Tell me I ought not even try.

But I have so much to say Ocean

And I know there are ears

waiting,

hoping,

needing

To hear my words.

Because I know others feel as I do.

I know others bear the anxiety and loneliness and pain

Same as I.

Ocean,

Carry my voice to the next island?