Dear Mom

Dear Mom,

The week you were buried, I started to pray for my siblings as you told me to do just days after the burial. I did tell a couple people how you came to me and asked me to not pray for you as you are with God, but to rather pray for my siblings. It did help me to stay calm.

I'm sorry that I could not do more for Carrie and Tim. You always said, that you wanted to die first, before your children. You always insinuated you knew who was going to die first. How did you know it would be Carrie and how did you know it would be cancer?

I thought it was because she was a smoker. Pot and cigarettes. It didn't seem to me it was very much, as she would occasionally quit smoking pot. I so miss her. I loved to dance with her. She definitely was a good dancer.

I used to smoke two to three packs a day. But luckily I quit smoking at twenty-four. My answer to how you knew about Carrie was that you had a gift. The same gift that is developing in me. Knowing the sex of a baby, sometimes knowing when someone is pregnant before they do.

Is this a gift I got from you?

Is it a gift or is it a curse? I don't always want to know. Especially when I get mixed signals and something unusual happens to the baby. One died and at least one had a birth defect.

There is nothing I can do to correct this. And what is knowing doing, especially if the parents do not want to know. They want to be surprised. Do I wreck the surprise? No, I just think about what I know and take the time to reflect.

I miss you mom and want to thank you for all you have done for me. I continue to pray for my remaining brothers. Would it be okay with you that we are adopting Devery? You know his siblings and parents are all deceased now. He has two daughters and one grandson.

I know he was around quite a bit at the end. He reminded you of your brother Herman. He was always close to Carrie. In age and in the time they spent together and with the friends and family they had in common. He always acted like he was your son.

Okay, well, that is what I have to say for today!

Love you mom, today and everyday!

Denise

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epistolary poetry is a letter in either poem or prose form. These literary letters are addressed to a particular person or group. This poem type dates back to as far as the Roman empire. From letters written during that era, it was further developed and popularized by the great Roman poets, Horace and Ovid.