Halloween '09

When you look at this picture, you see a little girl with pink makeup smeared all over her face, but to me, I behold a testament to a miracle. I glimpse a fighter who never backs down. I also recognize the clown who is my youngest child. In this photo, she is twenty-eight months old and celebrating her first time trick or treating.

My youngest daughter was born a fighter, little did we know it at the time. She was an easy infant, eating on schedule, asleep by 7 pm, awake by 6 am, sleeping all night, and walking by eight months. Extremely independent, Bonnie wanted to do whatever her older sister did, even though there were eight years between them. She was such a sweet baby, always willing to give hugs and kisses to family.

Bonnie was too young on her first Halloween to trick or treat. On her second Halloween, she couldn’t go because she had the flu, and I had to keep her at home, sick. On her third Halloween, she almost missed it because of a life-threatening disorder.

At twenty-one months old, I took her in for an appointment. A hemoglobin test was performed and her result was a critical 4. Her doctor wasn’t sure what was causing it, so he contacted St Jude’s in Memphis and discussed options with them, and they decided at that time we would monitor her, and see if her count would come up on its own. It didn’t.

Before she turned twenty-two months, I had her in the emergency room of the hospital where she was born, where her doctor had put in an order that if she was admitted she was to be transferred to a children's hospital nearer to St Jude’s because of her mystery blood disorder. She had had bruises appear on her upper thighs that grew to the size of grapefruits and turned black within minutes. By the time we arrived at the hospital, she had more bruises appearing, and they were all black as could be. I honestly was freaking out, because there was no reason for these bruises to appear. She’d had no falls.

Our local hospital treated me like I was a child abuser. They even gave her a rape test. We had arrived at 8 pm, and by 5 am, we were still in the ER, and she had not been put in a room or given anything for the pain she was in. Nor had she even seen an actual doctor, just the nurse. You could see her poor body going into shock.

Meanwhile, my husband was home with Courtney, our oldest, and worried, so he called our doctor’s number around 4 am. By chance, he mistakenly dialed his home number and reached him before he left for his office. The doctor called the hospital and asked them why they hadn’t followed his instructions. Before I knew what was going on, Bonnie was being transferred to the children’s hospital close to St Jude’s. Things happened fast once the EMTs took control, they even made sure Bonnie received some children's Tylenol for the trip.

She spent almost ten days in the children's hospital, with doctors from St Jude’s referring with the doctors of the hospital she was admitted in. Eventually, they finally diagnosed her with Antiphiloslipid Syndrome, with the help of doctors in Germany. Rare in someone her age, more common in menstruating women or elderly people. Her bruises turned into huge sores that they had to do ultrasounds on to make sure none went all the way down to the veins. They even did an ultrasound on her whole body to check for blood clots. She was started on Lovenox, an injectible blood thinner, that my husband and I both had to learn to give her.

She was twenty-six months old when the doctors decided her body was in remission enough and no longer needed the blood thinners. By this time, I was functioning like a robot, there’s nothing harder than giving your baby shots to keep them alive. I remember being so thankful that I could dispose of all the syringes because she had started wanting to give herself her medication instead of us.

It took another three months (Bonnie was twenty-nine months) until most of the scabs healed on her limbs from the bruising. She still has the scars to this day, and is proud of them, calling them her character marks. Bonnie tells others she’s a survivor when they ask about them.

Her first Halloween, she wanted to be a pretty princess that year. So, that's what she was. I bought her a lovely little pink costume, and her sister showed her the ropes that year (Courtney was a monster, as usual...). This picture was taken after we arrived back home and the candy was put up. Bonnie had found her sister's halloween makeup that Courtney had left out, and mixing the red and white together, made pink, smearing it all over her face. When I walked into the room, she looked up at me, and in a clear voice said, "Look, Mama, I a pretty pink princess." I of course snapped the picture right then. It was my Facebook profile picture for a few years, that's how much I love this photo.

She’s been through so much in her life and still finds a way to be a joy to all who love her. She's now seventeen, and a senior in high school. She still likes to joke around, and has a heart bigger than the state of Texas.

And Praise God, she's not had to go back on blood thinners.

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Antiphospholipid syndrome (APS) - an autoimmune disorder causing the body to produce abnormal antibodies, increasing the risk of blood clots.

Learn more about the disorder here: Mayo Clinic