Why we struggle with consistency? And How to Fix It.

Do you ever struggle with creating new habits?

Do you get internally frustrated when you fail to reach another goal?

Do you keep hearing that consistency is the secret to success but don’t know what that really means?

We set our intentions to reach X goal, but then life gets in the way, and we start treating our goals like dirty laundry — knowing we need to do something about it but letting it sit in the hamper for a little while longer.

So why is it that we know we need to be more consistent, but we struggle with such a simple concept?

#1: Over Expectations, Underperformance

Imagine that you’re laying down in your bed, scrolling through a blackhole of Facebook Posts, and then you come across what seems to be an ad promoting something. It will start out with saying something like “How X person reached [insert goal] in [insert some arbitrary amount of days]”

So like all things, your curiosity sparks. You click on the ad and then maybe you’re prompted to book a sales call or purchase some product that promises to teach you how to do XYZ.

What drew you to the ad in the first place?

You saw how someone was able to reach a goal that you’ve continuously failed to achieve on. You’ve reached a point where you’re tired of failing to reach your goals and it’s easier to buy something than actually do the work that’s necessary.

And maybe…this new purchasing high got you off to a good start. You come in with the expectation that you’re finally going to reach [insert goal], but then old habits start to pester you. You push off that one task, you say you’ll do it later — and then later becomes tomorrow, next week, next year, never.

So what went wrong?

Well, you over expected your personal dedication and underperformed on your follow through. It’s the consistent internal battle between who you are now vs. who you want to be in the future.

So how can we fix things?

First thing, stop saying no to your higher self (think: the you that already reached [insert goal])

For so long you’ve continued to say no to your goals because maybe, just maybe, you feel unworthy of actually reaching them. You aim so high where reality can barely touch the surface.

Second thing, expect to see a lack of gratification in the beginning stages.

We live in a world where we want results instantaneously.

But let me tell you that years of old habitual conditioning will take you longer than a week to reverse.

Look for the small wins, and then eventually you can appreciate knowing that they’ve contributed to the big wins, which leads me to…

#2 Taking big jumps when we were meant for lily pads

Remember when we said that an individual hitting some arbitrary goal in some arbitrary short amount of time is what drew us to the ad in the first place?

Yeah, well those results are more than likely one in infinity. Don’t hold yourself to someone else’s standards when you haven’t even begun to start doing the same level of work.

There’s usually a much longer story behind how someone reached their goal, more than likely it’s longer than a 30 minute webinar.

Instead of comparing yourself to that individual’s level of success, let’s take the time to reverse engineer how they actually got there. By breaking down big goals into milestones, and milestones to lilypad steps.

I like to use a simple 3,2,1 method.

In summary:

Identify the #1 goal that you want to achieve

Ex. Go to the gym more often

Break it down into 2 necessary steps

Ex. #1. Need to get a gym membership #2. Need to set a schedule for the gym

Identify 3 smaller steps for each step

#1 Need to get a gym membership

• Identify which gym

• Pick a plan

• Set a date to purchase

#2 Need to set a schedule for the gym

• Identify the amount of days going to the gym

• Pick 2 days

• Mondays and Wednesdays will be my days

This 3,2,1 method is a lot more specific than just saying you’ll reach “X” goal without actually creating a legitimate plan to back it up.

Additionally, once you have your plan in place, choose to measure progress by goals completed, not time spent.

You know what I am talking about.

“I’ve gone to the gym 3 times a week but haven’t gotten abs yet”

Okay, did you actually focus on ab building exercises? Did you implement a dietary plan to go along with it?

Just because you’ve spent a lot of time on something doesn’t mean that you’re making a lot of progress. If you measure progress by time spent you’ll spend a lot of time on many wasteless activities.

Finally, when you start something, actually see it through it’s completion.

No more, “I started it, but never went back to it”

Why do you think Shiny Object Syndrome Exists?

“Shiny object syndrome is the situation where people focus all attention on something that is new, current or trendy, yet drop this as soon as something new takes its place.”

If more people spent time actually working on completing it than finding the next quick [insert goal] scheme, a lot more people would start reaching their goals.

A tip to share is when you find yourself saying “later” to working on [insert goal], choose to suck it and spend 5 minutes on it. Soon, once you’re “in it”, you’ll start to realize you spent more time than 5 minutes…how do you think this article was written?

#3 Do different things, do things differently

“It can be really difficult to reach your goals while you’re still holding on to the old habits that got you to avoid them in the first place.”

We have to let go of who we are right now in order to create more room for who we are becoming.

As you can imagine, it’s a lot easier than it sounds.

I remember when I made a commitment to do Chloe Ting’s Two Week Shred Challenge. I thought to myself “Easy right? It’s only two weeks.” Well let’s just say those 2 weeks were absolutely grueling.

But you know what? My intention was to not necessarily to lose weight, my intention was to actually make a commitment to myself and follow through with it. So what did that mean?

Well, I had to actually start waking up earlier in order to fit in my 30–45 minute exercise routine, I had to second guess my food choices, and I had to do a lot of different things in order to be a different person.

But there was a frustrating point where I kept doing all of the above but my body literally was just not having it on the scale. I was on a weight plateau for what felt like days on end. I became frustrated and was very very close to quitting.

But then I thought, what are some different habits that I can start implementing?

I got my initial results because I was doing something differently, then when I started to hit another plateau I kept doing the same set of things and expecting different results. Read that once more.

“Doing the same thing over and over again but expecting different results is the literal definition of insanity.”

So what did I do?

I started implementing intermittent fasting, and started to walk home rather than take the bus. Then finally my body started cooperating with me.

Finally, look for the small wins.

If you can’t physically see the win, then maybe it’s not a physical win that you should be looking for.

Diversify your WINdow.

As in, wins can have many different perspectives than the eye can see. Consider the fact that you’ve made a commitment to yourself and followed through as the win itself.

In summary, struggling with consistency is not uncommon. However, it’s the secret ingredient to your success; when you master the art of consistency you can master the art to pretty much anything.

Know that it’s not how much time you put in, but how many goals you complete.

Know that when you continue to say no to yourself you’re only prolonging the person that you wish you could be.

Know that when you’re stuck in a rut try doing different things, and doing things differently.

What’s the #1 thing you struggle with when it comes to building the habit of consistency?

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