Who are you running from?

When the dark of night creeps in to find you laying awake, staring at the ceiling, covers pulled up to your chin, what is running through your mind? What nightmares are you trying to avoid? Do you think of me? of us as we once used to be? Do my tears invade your darkest dreams?

When I wake in the night the stars still bright and the stillness of a sleeping world lays outside my window, what thoughts go through my head? A million memories of a past meant to teach me lesson after lesson, each one meant to be. People in my dreams I've never met yet somehow know their faces and I wonder in what lifetime this was meant.

Each person in our life is meant to be there when they come they have something to teach us or something to learn and they will leave when that lesson is learned. Each persons time with us predestined before we ever came.

I knew your soul before we arrived and rejoiced when we reconnected. I didn't know why or how or when but I knew I loved you then and that love remains inside my soul to this day. No matter the rate of downfall, no matter the flags red as fire. I love you to this day.

The sound of your laugh, the twinkle of your eye. The soft comfort of your embrace. I love your soul deep inside that body that just never stops running from itself.

I run from the feeling of loss, abandonment turned personal. Never understood before it reflects on the person doing the abondoning, not on me the abandoned. What reflects on me is how I handle the situation. I can rise and stand on my own two feet, learning the lesson before me, or I can cower in fear and let the darkness embrace me forever. I choose the light. I choose to love.

I run from the mistakes I've made that got me here. I run from the things I don't even remember. I try and connect to inner self and awaken the magic in me. I try and quiet my thoughts, listening for any advise or thoughts coming through from universe. I face that I am not perfect, I have toxic traits I need to work on. Gossip. Judging. Anger. Jealousy. Self love and respect. Moving forward and being present are not something I am good at. These are always a lot of lessons to be working on.

Here we are full circle, wondering if Karma brought you back to me to teach or for another lesson. I am certainly learning many that I thought i'd already learned. Guess we are up for round two and better reactions to the things being taught this round. I'm up for whatever because if there is one thing I've learned, none of us are getting any younger and the time although irrelevant, just keeps speeding right along.

Take the time you do have to face the monsters in the dark. Take the time you do have to learn to better yourself so your soul can wake up and shine. Take the time to forgive yourself for the way you handled the shadows in the dark before you knew any better. Then face those shadows and give them the proper love and respect they deserve because they helped get you to where you are right now.

Face the darkness of the lessons, set the trauma free to heal. Feel the emotions then them let go and know that it's okay to cry, it's okay to forgive, it's okay to not be perfect. It's okay to be the human you that you are.

Heal the wounds made by others, change your perspective seen by you. Open you eyes to possibilities yet seen. Take the steps forward toward your dreams, intent on your best possible life outcome. Have faith that it all works out for your better good in the end. We all come here with a mission and if not fulfilled it will be another day, another time, another life.

There are an infinite amount of timelines, an infinite amount of choices to choose. None of them are wrong, they are all just another lesson to learn, another life to live, another dream to pursue.

Stop running from yourself, stop running from true love. Stop holding on to what is gone and focus on what is. Let your heart feel the love of the universe, the connection to all. Let your soul shine in it's own authenticity. Sop running and let yourself heal. Forgive yourself for what you had to do to survive and make the choice to be better.

Be who you are. Without apologies. Realize you are enough for you, and that is all that matters. Realize you are important just as you are. Be you. Be free. Be love. Set yourself free.