Things I Wish My 20-Year Old Self Knew

A Conversation and A Question

“Hey, what advice would you give someone in their twenties?” I was somewhat blind-sighted by this question. We were talking about careers and education previously.

I paused. Took a deep breath. Then I imagined if my 20-year-old self were standing before me, what would I say to them?

After much thought, I answered the question as honestly as I could.

I immediately went home and made a list. I wanted to share it. So, here it is:

The List

Don’t rush life, allow it to unfold.

When you are young, you tend to want life to speed up. We plan things and have expectations of how life is supposed to be. The reality is no one has done this before. We are all traveling this road together.

How does anyone know what life is supposed to be? That is the whole purpose, right? To learn, discover, and enjoy the journey. Be patient with yourself while you figure things out.

It’s okay not to know everything.

You are twenty years old. Life is just beginning. Think about it. You spent 12 years at home with parents/guardians and technically graduated around age 18.

That leaves two years between then and now. This is the time to fail, learn, and grow. You won’t always be and feel this youthful. So, go and learn something — get out of your comfort zone.

This is the perfect time for trial and error. Allow yourself to make mistakes, follow your passions, and take a chance on yourself. Even the smartest, strongest, and most successful people don't have all the answers.

Take responsibility.

You are considered an adult now. Regardless of what did or did not happen to or for you, your life is in your hands now.

You are at the beginning of adulthood. If you need help, ask a trusted adult. Now is the time to look at what is working and what isn’t for you.

Take an audit of your life, but be honest and gentle with yourself. Sit down and look at all the areas of life. Ask yourself the serious questions.

Where are you putting too much time and effort? What can you delegate? What goals can you start right now? What is keeping me stuck? How can I fix it?

In the end, figure out where you want to go and who you want to become.

Self-love is important.

Self-love is hard to understand until you realize it is the root of everything. It all starts and ends with you. Learning to love all parts of you can be a difficult thing to do.

It is vital to work on yourself during this time. Love the parts you deem unloveable, ask the hard questions, and find the truth. You will be better off for it.

Have a system.

This will take time to build and a lot of trial and error. Every successful person has a system and habits that are in place. Whatever you decide to be or do, have a system.

Having a system in place takes the guesswork out of everything. It gives you something to fall back on. Life is messy, and having a system is something that you can control and eventually rely on.

These are five little pieces of advice for the 20-year-old wondering about life. It’s not a complete list, but it is a start.

There is so much that you will learn on your path. Remember, it is your path. There are things that other people can tell you, but it is your journey to fulfill in the end.