The World is My Charbroiled Oyster

Dear World,

Often I'm amazed at how much light can be found in the darkness. As a child that came into the world with much too little hope of finding an existence after 25, I want to thank you from the bottom of my heart. There has been no greater advisor, teacher, nor mentor than life experience. While some may be able to narrow their experiences and course of success to a few specific people, I am pleased to say I cannot.

Growing up, I remember feeling mostly rage. Time after time, I felt let down by the people I deemed most important in my life. Whether my absent father or distant mother; those feelings became embedded inside me. As life continued, I would make the same traumatized connection with any scenario that would reflect abandonment or disconnect.Whether it be a friend not standing beside me during a dispute or a cry for help that went completely unnoticed. Compound feelings were brewing inside of me that only became stronger as I grew. I wanted to be loved by anything or anyone; and that's just what you gave me. A catalog of experiences teaching me about love, humanity, and the miracle of giving back.

It's a rarity these days to find myself in disbelief, but many times I am still in awe over all the obstacles you've helped me through. None could ever top the time in Los Angeles when I found myself fighting on Skid Row during St. Patrick's Day. There were more than seven drunk men attempting to "open up a can of whoop-ass" on the semi depressed black man taking stock of his place in the world. You taught me to stand my ground. When four of the men charged me in unison, you taught me that love sheds so many hidden colors in the darkness. I would never have dreamed that the same homeless people I see everyday and speak to with love in my heart, would step in to help. Fist clinched and prepared to protect me, I watched as the drunk men coward away from us standing together as one. That day, I learned the value behind strength in numbers and the effect of the golden rule. "Treat others how you wish to be treated."

I want thank you so much for my experiences as a youth, they taught me what confusion and pain can do to a child and their mental state. I see now how critical it is to allow youth a healthy space to express themselves and their frustrations. Through the random chosen souls you decided to send messages through, I have been able to build my inner child back up into a place of strength for self and for others. Most of all, you've taught me how to transmute this energy from pain to love for all youth; but specifically for those with a similar background of neglect. You've allowed me to be their voice, their shoulder and I love you dearly for that.

Not sure if you are aware, but you were the first person to teach me how to fall flat on my faith. As a 30 year-old man, I frequently feel stagnant or without direction. I've seen you watch as I comb my environment for a mentor to learn from. Once I become still and open to experience, I find that you will send me through needed journeys to help guide, nurture, and mature my mind. It has been such a pleasure and discomfort to see you in your many forms. Love, of course, is my favorite. The power that love holds in reframing my thought process is nothing shy of a miracle. Through love, I am able to deconstruct the horrific world I knew as a child, and build new mindsets along with memories that change me for the better. Whenever I see you in this form, I forget the weight of abandonment. I simply attempt and accept, hoping to have made an impact on someone's life other than my own.

While you have given me a great amount tools to navigate the chaos around me, there is no gift that you have instilled in me greater than evolution. Being able to evolve past my trauma, pain, and hurt to empathize with someone else's point of voice is something I truly hope you share with everyone. I have been able to salvage some of the most beautiful souls simply by seeing them for who they are. When I step outside of my trauma I approach people as human; capable of incomprehensible mistakes. Once this is realized, forgiveness now has all the space needed for change to occur. Guess who taught me that one? It was you, the world!

It's no secret that you have shaped my entire life. Without your trails and tribulations, I would never be compassionate for all people. I would not believe in abundance, forgiveness, and healing as devices for becoming free in mind. My quest to change the world and the view of mental health would not exist. Worst of all, I would have never found the space to understand why my life matters. Not long ago, I was on the edge of life itself ready to throw the towel in; but you taught me the power of not giving up. Life does has its darker sides, but there are many moments filled with loving strangers willing to cater to life being your oyster. Just don't be upset if your oyster becomes charbroiled throughout the process. Nine times out of ten, you will become seasoned and more prepared for the purpose you were made for. I just want to thank you for helping me realize that.

Love,

-Eric J. Couto